poemranker ::Perversions 5: Kink vs. Mothra by razorgrin

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Limerick № 40758

Perversions 5: Kink vs. Mothra

by razorgrin

Member since 2002 · Posted 18 Feb 2003 · 32 comments

Salad Tossing In prison's a very large man Six-eight, quite tattooed, his name's Dan With syrup or Spam or blueberry jam Of salad-tossing Dan will make you a fan. Qualing An eccentric professor at Yale was consumed with a passion to quale. That quirky old Phil danced like Buffalo Bill And wished he'd been born a female. Disemboweling (for Trevor) The landlord looked in with a scowl "I've put up with perversions quite foul. I don't mind what you do Just clean up when you're through. Use a Shop-Vac if you must disembowel!" P.S. I have no idea if 'qualing' is spelled right. The fellow who wrote it down for me is spectacularly bad at spelling. For those of you who dispute the place of disembowelment in these poemes, it shows up because Trev was talking about it as an arousing act. Don't blame me.

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32 comments

[8] bunniesnangels 18-Feb-03/1:46 PM Reply
There's no such word as "qualing" in my dictionary, but then again, I'm an American..
[n/a] razorgrin › bunniesnangels 18-Feb-03/1:47 PM Reply
It is a sexual slang term as well. Could be 'quailing'. I don't want to look it up either way, so it shall remain a mystery.
[8] horus8 18-Feb-03/6:49 PM Reply
it's Quailing named after that thingy that hangs in their face... lol. the last was the best.
[n/a] razorgrin › horus8 19-Feb-03/6:25 AM Reply
Thank you. i liked the last one best as well.
[9] Tintagiles 19-Feb-03/10:32 AM Reply
The last one is excellent, but the other two don't seem as great, m'dear. Possibly because they don't really let people figure out what they're about as well as the others do.
[n/a] razorgrin › Tintagiles 19-Feb-03/1:24 PM Reply
The other two were difficult to explain without desending into mere vulgarity. I like the effect of leaving things a little suggestive.
[10] thepinkbunnyofdoom 19-Feb-03/3:06 PM Reply
LMAO.
[n/a] razorgrin › thepinkbunnyofdoom 20-Feb-03/10:51 AM Reply
thanks.
[0] sk8boardandpoems 25-Feb-03/3:36 PM Reply
i hate it and its crap all of it i wouldn't be surprised if he copied it from his friend that he killed out of jealousy
[n/a] razorgrin › sk8boardandpoems 26-Feb-03/6:37 AM Reply
That's the most inane statement I've heard since I last read your stuff. What di you mean, about trev copying it? he just told me the name of it.
[6] hipster flare 3-Mar-03/7:36 AM Reply
odd. the words are interesting--but not rhythmically limericky.
[9] Bachus 3-Mar-03/4:02 PM Reply
you need double penetration undoubtedly.
[0] TanHand 3-Mar-03/9:08 PM Reply
Poemes huh? Fucking talentless poseur. You don't have the talent, you know? The talent. That's what's missing. Irreverence, gore, who gives a shit. Raise your hand. The class is silent.
[n/a] razorgrin › TanHand 4-Mar-03/8:52 PM Reply
Maybe you just suck. I have talent out the wazoo. You're the only one who complains, possibly only due to your own thwarted sex drive. See an analyst. I am a sexual surrealist genius. In closing, fuck you and the horse you long for, assmaggot.
[7] bondjedi 6-Apr-03/11:39 AM Reply
tedious yet disturbing. i give you a 7
[n/a] razorgrin › bondjedi 6-Apr-03/7:35 PM Reply
halfway thanks.
[10] suckmychucks 9-Apr-03/12:49 PM Reply
i give you a 10 for plagiarizing someone elses bad spelling. chump.
[n/a] razorgrin › suckmychucks 10-Apr-03/11:05 AM Reply
I give you a finger and a plague of irate candiru fish. I do not look up quialing, therefore I did not know of the exact spelling. I apologized in the poem if it was incorrect. I did not plagiarise, you snivelling little shit. I asked a dear friend for suggestions and he wrote me out a list of topics. As for spelling, you spelled "else's" improperly, leaving out the apostrophe denoting the posessive. However, I suppose I can expect that sort of churlishness from an insignificant little twit who would attempt to insult me in the manner you did. Now, kindly go make sweet love to a mid-sized saguaro cactus. Hugs 'n' kisses!
[0] Lord Ganus 10-Apr-03/11:09 PM Reply
Prison rape isn't funny, despite what american mass media may have you believe. www.spr.org.
[n/a] razorgrin › Lord Ganus 11-Apr-03/3:11 PM Reply
Nah, it's funny. soap droppage=comedy gold.
[4] Poetsettle 18-May-03/10:34 AM Reply
OOOOOK!
[6] RealmOfSong 10-Jun-03/6:47 AM Reply
Disembowling is gross but it's funny. ^_^
[10] PoeTech 20-Jun-03/12:13 PM Reply
Be sure to read my lates poem - Theology - It's amazing!!
[n/a] StuntHornist 22-Jul-03/2:32 PM Reply
That's what dictionaries are for, dude.
[n/a] LuckyJoe 23-Jul-03/10:06 AM Reply
Interesting.
[8] Settle 20-Aug-03/5:58 AM Reply
What is more arousing than that?? (Hint: nothing) Wait no, attractive girls, sorry, attractive girls are more arousing than killing things. But that's pretty fucking arousing let me tell you.
[5] J.B. Manning 20-Aug-03/1:08 PM Reply
Did you write this or did someone else? Instead of inserting a phrase explaining your spelling errors, why not just take the time to use spell check?


[n/a] razorgrin › J.B. Manning 5-Sep-03/4:57 AM Reply
Funny you should ask, fuckwit. I took the spelling of the word "quailing" from Trev because, as a sexual slang term, it isn't too fucking likely to be in Webster's. I asked him for some inspiration for the poemes as he's an inspiring kind of guy. Also, if you actually use spell check, you need to die immediately. The morality of the charming Mr. Trevor isn't up for debate, however. The explanatory phrase stands, but I have a rather surprising list of things that you should be inserting in your own body of work.I also take some serious offense at the suggestion of plagiarism. Them are indeed fightin' words
[n/a] deleted user 21-Aug-03/10:36 PM Reply
What do you mean by this curious phrase "salad tossing"? This poem does not serve well its ambiguity. Or its amby goo ity.
[3] deleted user 27-Aug-03/1:50 PM Reply
I blame you
[8] Dreammaker1024 12-Mar-05/1:49 PM Reply
Rather interesting
[1] Edna Sweetlove 15-May-06/5:16 PM Reply
Not good. Where were you when the humour tablets were handed out?