poemranker ::Wanking by Bobjim

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Free verse № 32665

Wanking

by Bobjim

Member since 2002 · Posted 30 Dec 2002 · Edited 20 Jan 2003 · 16 comments

I like to spank my monkey, I do it all day long, I think it's really funky, If I jack off with tongs. I use my computer disk drive, to insert my 3 inch floppy, I also use a bee hive, Which hurts like shit OWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! I'VE STUNG MY COCK! AH! AH! I'M ALLERGIC TO BEES!! AH! SHIT! ITS CRAWLED UP MY ASS! ACTULY, I Quite like it.... Oh, yea... crawl up my ass!

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6 votes so far. Yours would make 7.6 votes so far

16 comments

[0] Ranger 30-Dec-02/9:40 AM Reply
Ugh
[n/a] Caducus 30-Dec-02/10:04 AM Reply
easy come, easy go,
whip it or flip it
sexy snow
[8] -=SeTTle=- 30-Dec-02/4:30 PM Reply
I don't think I can top this.??
[n/a] Bobjim › -=SeTTle=- 30-Dec-02/5:00 PM Reply
I think maybe I should top myself.
[n/a] <{Baba^Yaga}> › Bobjim 3-Jan-03/6:43 AM Reply
This comment/sentence alone was worth the booger chewing boredom of skimming your poem, but i did notice a few errors,


"OWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!" should be kerplochie,"actuly" should be a retrospective complete with sound effects, and three inch floopy should be more reserved, say two? and we did kiddie porn last month, which makes you kitsch, or some other euro trash word that constitutes dumpster diving.
[0] Ranger 31-Dec-02/10:10 AM Reply
Excellent
[5] <~> 3-Jan-03/7:06 AM Reply
now, settle, you know i've been there, and we've tried every single one of my 'appliances'... what kind of batteries did h say to use? because, damn you, you keep running them (and me) dry. you cheeky little energizer bunny, you!
[9] cleverdevice 6-Jan-03/8:03 AM Reply
Nice one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[7] deleted user 20-Jan-03/3:01 AM Reply
this is bizarrely funny
[8] horus8 20-Jan-03/4:12 PM Reply
If one asks of your metier..do you reply, "the art of dehumarizing the universe?". no, it's all in the name of meatloaf and chin hair on woman. You are boot to curb scrapings Sir. a cad, or quite possibly a cadet.
[10] lunar 9-Apr-03/8:04 AM Reply
Ranger tells me you are Perrins! i cant belive it! it cant be true! i did not know you could do humour of this caliber. unless its all true, oh shit....
[n/a] Bobjim › lunar 9-Apr-03/11:39 AM Reply
I,m insulted, how dare you connect me with that malcontent perrins. is his name bob? or jim? no! so don't ever say that again.
[n/a] Bobjim › Bobjim 9-Apr-03/11:58 AM Reply
Was that you Craigus, or Bob?
Yes, I did write these 'poems' but other miscreants have access to this acount I'm afraid.
[n/a] Bobjim › Bobjim 10-Apr-03/12:08 PM Reply
It was Bob, who are these other miscreants, i must terminate them.
[10] lunar 9-Apr-03/12:14 PM Reply
Who/what are you then? huh huhuhuhuh?
[n/a] Bobjim › lunar 9-Apr-03/1:31 PM Reply
We are Bobjim, and Bobjim is us.
Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.