poemranker ::Deeper by Skamper

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Senryu № 152935

Deeper

by Skamper

Member since 2007 · Posted 29 Jun 2007 · 9 comments

I do not fear love Nearly as much as I should Frighten me some more

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mean 8.71 weighted 6.00 rank 1307 views 240 View voting details →

7 votes so far. Yours would make 8.7 votes so far

9 comments

[9] nypoet22 30-Jun-07/12:10 AM Reply
made me chuckle.
[n/a] Skamper › nypoet22 30-Jun-07/6:18 PM Reply
oh - you are just cruel!!
[8] Dovina 30-Jun-07/4:46 PM Reply
Love ends! Frightened now?
[n/a] Skamper › Dovina 30-Jun-07/6:00 PM Reply
no - the fear would be gone, replaced by sadness and mourning.
[8] Ranger 1-Jul-07/3:18 AM Reply
Punctuate the end of line two, otherwise it reads: I do not fear love nearly as much as I should frighten me some more. Which is a little confusing.
[n/a] Skamper › Ranger 1-Jul-07/6:19 PM Reply
the end of the line should give you the break needed, even after the first line there is a pause - if you read the whole thing pausing after each line there shouldn't be a problem.
[9] lmp › Skamper 2-Jul-07/9:02 AM Reply
i agree. eschewing puctuation altogether leaves it open to the reader's interpretation.

i would agree with Ranger only if there was a period (or "full stop", "full point" or "dot", choose your favorite nomenclature) at the end of the last line.
[9] lmp 2-Jul-07/9:03 AM Reply
are you in love with a sociopath?

just kidding. i like it.
[n/a] Skamper › lmp 3-Jul-07/6:53 PM Reply
Yes