Help | About | Suggestions | Alms | Chat [0] | Users [0] | Log In | Join
 Search:
Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments   

Devil, Devil, Hear Me Pray (Other) by PsydewaysTears
Devil, Devil, Hear me pray. Listen close To what I say: I would pay you to tempt me With your every little lie And send to me your malice Wrapped up in a cherry pie. Devil, Devil, Hear me pray. Keep my sobbing Eyes at bay: I would beg you to strike me As a Devil only could. I deserve more to suffer Than to be just understood. Devil, Devil, Hear me pray. Teach me of The wicked way: I would ask you to take me Far away from who I am. I bet there is no one here Who would even give a damn. Devil, Devil, Hear me pray. Take me, Take— Take me away: But if I cannot make you Do to me what you must... I will send me to you With a single, well-placed thrust!

Up the ladder: Head.
Down the ladder: Sequence

You must be logged in to leave comments. Vote:

Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 30
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 6.2
Weighted score: 5.1430435
Overall Rank: 5411
Posted: January 27, 2005 12:12 AM PST; Last modified: January 27, 2005 1:13 AM PST
View voting details
Comments:
[10] Lifeboatman @ 203.104.94.2 | 27-Jan-05/4:26 AM | Reply
haha.. anything with the devil in it deserves more than a ten... but, alas, we only have up to ten and the devil doesn't exist... life is unfair
[7] Dovina @ 205.184.71.11 | 27-Jan-05/11:58 AM | Reply
Anything with suicide in it deserves a zero, but because of Verse 4 and the first half of Verse 6, you get a 7.
[7] wilco @ 24.165.207.93 | 28-Jan-05/6:26 PM | Reply
I've never understood the whole Devil worship thing. If you believe in that whole fairy tale about God and the Devil, why would you choose to worship the one thats going to make you suffer forever...must be a masochist. Anyway, some of the lines aren't bad, the subject notwithstanding.
[n/a] PsydewaysTears @ 69.240.74.35 > wilco | 28-Jan-05/10:36 PM | Reply
well, I don't believe in the Devil or worship..... anything at all. But I do have my moments when, to me, it seems he sets the mood grandly.
[7] SupremeDreamer @ 216.99.240.139 | 30-Jan-05/4:41 AM | Reply
Not bad, not bad, but I have some edits to suggest:


1st Stanza--
Devil, Devil, hear me pray,
listen close to what I say.

2nd Stanza--
I would pay you to tempt me
with your clever little lies,
offer me your cruel malice
wrapped up in a cherry pie.

3rd Stanza--
Devil, Devil, hear me pray;
keep my sobbing eyes at bay.

4rth Stanza--
I would beg you to smite me
As only Lucifer himself could.
I deserve to suffer much more
Than merely being understood.

5th Stanza--
Devil, Devil, hear me pray;
teach me the wisdom of your wicked way.

7th Stanza--
Devil, Devil, hear me pray;
take me, take- take my spirit away:

8th Stanza--
If I can not make you do
to me what you must,
I'll offer my soul to you
with a single direct thrust.


Consider them if you feel so inclined.
Blessed with seven.
198 view(s)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001