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A Permanent Fixture (Free verse) by wilco
A giant stands among the weeds Standing guard over nothing Its arms outstretched and beckoning to its denizens with flames upon withered fingers. It has stood in this place for a decade more than life; Seeing all and knowing nothing but the secret of survival. With no measure of the years and no care for wasted time, it sits idly as nothing more than a vessel for the earth. Casting only soft shadows upon the faded prints of feet, it watches valiantly over the slowly dimming lights and it's dying children below. With no measure of the years and no care for wasted time, it sits idly as nothing more than a vessel for the earth. And as the waning hours slowly bleed life into the night, the docile behemoth waits quietly for the coming of another day.

Up the ladder: An Ode To An Angel

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 7.25
Weighted score: 5.6051183
Overall Rank: 2293
Posted: March 21, 2004 4:09 PM PST; Last modified: March 21, 2004 4:09 PM PST
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Comments:
[9] deleted user @ 68.169.177.107 | 21-Mar-04/4:25 PM | Reply
The whole affair seem pretty much like this sometimes. Good rhythm. You put the feeling accross; that's what I like.
[8] zodiac @ 67.240.155.124 | 21-Mar-04/5:38 PM | Reply
I'll give this a 10 if you send me a tape recording of yourself reading it in a deep wizardy voice.
[n/a] Fear of Garbage @ 156.63.85.17 | 23-Mar-04/9:30 AM | Reply
ok now be honest. you wrote this awhile ago too, didn't you? good, but not as good as the first poem i read of yours.
i really thought the last sanza was good, the 1st three lines anyway, but the last line just kind of faded out. i think....maybe you need to work on your endings. something more...grabbing or poignant.
[n/a] wilco @ 24.176.102.131 > Fear of Garbage | 23-Mar-04/1:14 PM | Reply
Yes, I wrote this one about 2 years ago during the summer. It's hard to touch up the older ones because I feel like I need to have the same feeling and be in the same place as when I wrote it. And, you're right, I do often tend to screw up the endings. ;)
[5] Jill Stockinger @ 0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1 | 27-Dec-20/4:56 PM | Reply
(its dying- no apostrophe in this case)
[5] Jill Stockinger @ 127.0.0.1 | 27-Dec-20/4:56 PM | Reply
(its dying- no apostrophe in this case)
286 view(s)




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