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Few Too Little (Free verse) by talking_goldfish Fire,
Your soul is burning,
Burning its demons within,
Burning hate, burning fear,
And all its demons bring,
Earth,
Your soul is growing,
Growing its roots below,
Growing tall, growing strong,
Growing quick, not slow,
Water,
Your soul is leaking,
Leaking your goodness away,
Leaking love, leaking warmth,
To another, whose heart youve slain,
Few too little people,
Will ever get to see,
The warmth you have, the warmth you hold,
The warmth you gave to me.
Up the ladder:
When the wheels stop turning.
Down the ladder:
dps
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.375
Posted: August 8, 2002 9:45 AM PDT; Last modified: August 8, 2002 9:45 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.100853 Overall Rank: 6034 Comments:
[4]
<~> @ 167.206.181.179
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8-Aug-02/11:26 AM
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Reply
fire, earth, water, AIR. then maybe self. if you're going to get elemental on us, that is.
very interesting
Nice idea, and executed with a dab of panache. 7. The ending's a little wishy-washy, but as a whole, there's still something there to interest the reader.
you know the more of these shit poems this bog fellow praises the stronger and stronger i get...keep going you lover and praiser of weak scripture..i'm having the time of my life reading your constant one brain cell powered banter, are you a jewish cantor? were you in the car with princess di when they headlined the pillar? cuz wow your fucking chiding pursed english sensibility is right up the alley of a merchant ivory film...the english patient part deux...another tiresome three hours with a burn victim in the desert..is just what this site needed..not that your even from england..cuz i'd bet money you're just the semen soaked left hand of some midwestern poemranking ten year old with a knack for creating false identities, and if by chance you are from the land of drizzle...then..even better, cuz with you breathing and stinking up the place...no wonder you people always say "god save the queen" save her from having to listen, and or read any of your short, bland, see through, mind de-expanding rhetoric lacking rhetoric...ode to the sea blah blee ree tee blah blah i'm deep blah blah..i'm from england land of literary geniuses..blah..blah the sea blee vlee....you americans..blah blah should learn from me blah blah...we beat your pathetic asses then...stole your colony..and evolved at a hundred times the rate of your so called country(cuz i don't even think this clown is even english) has in 1500 years..do the math..we are two hundred some odd years old, and ye are over a thousand yet..we americans have saved your asses economicaly, militarily, and stylistically more times than i care to count...stay there.. enjoy your short termed reading materials..you deserve it..and your welfare too. you fucking two versed parrot...ha! 3/10
o..k, well, i'm sensing u don't like the poem!! but as for the rest of ur pointless comment god only knows. and actually, i am english, although why u find that hard 2 believe i have no idea. anyway, i shall now get back 2 more precious matters, like singing the o so great national anthem, (god save the queen) until the day i die, whilst @ home, IN ENGLAND!
Dumb yanks. I'd say something to the effect of "Don't mind them, they're still mad from when we burned down the white house", but the poem just isn't that great. Still, "dumb yanks".
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