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I smell coffee (Other) by Princess_Snowflake I smell a strong smell of coffee
floating around the air in here
I am craving for coffee
with a rich, strong taste
I want to drink coffee
with anything I want
I cannot stop craving
until I have a big taste of coffee
from the tasty coffee beans
It smells like pure Colombian and Arabica
or espresso
I smell coffee around here
and want a big taste of it
I want the taste in my mouth
that would keep me asking for more and more
I cannot smile without any coffee
until I taste it
I cannot be awake
until I taste the coffee
Why can't I have some?
Why can't I crave for coffee?
Why can't I pour myself some hot, delecious
coffee in the morning?
I smell coffee everyday and feel the taste in my
tongue.
Up the ladder:
Stealing Glory
Down the ladder:
love your mother:
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 4.818182
Posted: December 18, 2003 9:42 AM PST; Last modified: December 18, 2003 9:42 AM PSTWeighted score: 4.909091 Overall Rank: 9701 Comments:
delicious.
my sentiments exactly. but it must be organic - fewer chemicals. "why can't i?" YES
Too much redundancy, shame because at least you tried to deviate from the usual addiction poems on this site.
'i am a coffee addict/i will drink more of it/ until my toes fall off.
If you can be so hooked on coffee. Never try DRUGS?
I like this poem. Wright poems just how you feel dont take note of these first grade English dicks who tell you every things wrong.......
oh yes, please "wright" them, but for the love of god don't write them!
Oh YES baby. This coffee, it VIBRATES? Seriously I don't care how many rules this poem breaks I love it. It is robust, exuberant, with an innocent aftertaste of blossoms, full of body. And full of metaphorical body, or at least i read it that way, but I'm just an old lech. I COULD NOT STOP thinking "blowjob" the whole way through. I WANT TO BE COFFEE!!!! Can I be coffee, can I please please? KEEP going snowflake, I think you are the next Princess Bukowski.
This pome is vastly better than yours. Yours didn't make me think of getting a blowjob AT ALL!
one year later, this pome still gives me a giant hard-on. Princess_Snowflake, you are the bestest lolita poetess on the net!
grating due to repetition and grammatically incorrect.
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This is a stupid line. Of course you smell a SMELL of coffee. You can't smell anything other than a SMELL. So to say you smell a SMELL of coffee is like saying "I tasted a taste", or "I felt a feeling", or "I dreamt a dream". You should have written something like "A strong smell of coffee fills my heart with brownful lust"
Line 2: "floating around the air in here"
Again redundancy. If you can smell a smell of coffee, it's obvious that the smell is floating around in the air because smells can only be transmitted to the nose glands via a gaseous medium. You should have left this line out.
Line 3: "I am craving for coffee"
Sounds awkward. You should have said something like "Oh precious bean! Why do you tempt me so!?"
...
Line 14: "I want the taste in my mouth"
Do you, indeed? I want the taste in my ear.
Line 21: "Why can't I crave for coffee?"
I don't understand this line at all. I thought the whole point in this poeme was that you DO crave for coffee. I can understand you craving coffee but, for whatever reason, being unable to drink it. But unable to crave it? That's just crazy talk.
Overall: A good try! I'm sure you'll be an excellent poete in no time!!!!!1111
you are hypercritical!
this is poetry - may redundancies abound again and again!!