| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
Something I Hope I Would Not Hear Myself Speak (Free verse) by Lifeboatman The bitches of our time are as plentiful
As the flying pigs of antiquity
And with as much decency too
Though their nest-sties had changed
To haystacks, then to cabarets
And then to bust seats and pool tables,
They still copulate to make extreme their countenances
And don their promiscuity without shame
Up the ladder:
solitude
Down the ladder:
Suggestions
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.142857
Posted: November 12, 2003 10:04 PM PST; Last modified: November 12, 2003 10:04 PM PSTWeighted score: 5.03842 Overall Rank: 7206 Comments:
[9]
Jeremi B. Handrinos @ 24.126.116.54
|
13-Nov-03/12:37 AM
|
Reply
Yes, they'll hump eachother if none else with a pointer can be found.
Hello Butch:o) seems ur tongue must be tied & the pen taken, if u insist in writing as such:o)
remember, this is not meant as an offense for the sexually active nor to the professionals who give sexual pleasure in exchange for currency... i've quite a lot of respect for both cases of human existense since I see love making as a very amiable past time and I have great respect to the people of the latter of both sex and all gender... still, I wish I would not hear myself speak these things... write it-- maybe...
Reads pretty good, actually. Sometimes those wings can give a pre-impression.
Couple crits for you, if you are so inclined. a comma after "decency" would work well overall, methinks nest-[sites]? or were you making a play on "nasty"; either way. "bust seats"? what is that? bus seats? if the "nest-sties" was intentional, then I'd believe this was too. The last two lines are - perfect.
thanks.. but I think this poem really doesn't have to be perfected as I think of it as a crock of shit... and for bust seats, it was intentional but I also don't know what they are, sounded great, though, while I was writing the piece...
long time, no see- ive missed your works, and enjoyed this one- even though its pencrap to you.
bust seats- slightly confusing, but i understand what you mean, i hope: empty seats? (bust- adj, lacking funds?) well anyway, heres an 8. 305 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
