Jesus was no superstar. He was a superstar with cheese minus the special sauce.

[x] AABBCC rhyming scheme [x] About romantic love [x] Arbitrary indentation [x] Arbitrary line breaks [x] Autobiographical but in the third person [x] Clerical errors [x] Cliched rhymes (love/above etc.) [_] Cliched adolescent metaphors of darkness for despair etc. [x] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments [_] Devoid of rhyme [_] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices [_] Devoid of wond'rous or fantastical imagery [x] Drug references [_] Elves, unicorns, etc. [_] Exclamation points used to mark 'the funny bits' [_] Insipidly whimsical or zany [_] Leaving rant [_] Lower case only [_] Melodramatic [_] Naively religious or superstitious [x] Obsessed with femininity [_] Overabundance of ellipses [_] Overuse of Latinate words and/or convoluted sentence structures [x] Pointedly unanswered questions [_] Protagonist has a smug name [_] Rage against the machine [_] References to the author's 'social life' [_] Repetition of a single word or phrase to the point of nausea [x] Sanctimoniously moral [x] Sappy _[] Self-pity [_] Suicide-related [x] Wish fulfilment

[x]Devoid of content.