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Charter Of Rights (Free verse) by EAger to Offend The quest to increase brain blood volume
Is illegal in this mental state,
The same state where one is not allowed
To die of ones own accord,
The state of Morality
Which chastises the masochists,
And the curious,
And other individuals
Who venture off
To new worlds for peace
While you remain
Committed to
Slavery.
Up the ladder:
The words of touch
Down the ladder:
Dress rehearsal
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Arithmetic Mean: 3.75
Posted: October 1, 2003 1:48 AM PDT; Last modified: October 1, 2003 1:48 AM PDTWeighted score: 4.8509965 Overall Rank: 10542 Comments:
[8]
Quarton @ 12.217.221.61
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8-Jul-04/11:52 AM
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Reply
I like the message in this piece and agree. One minor nitpick. I would delete the "off" so it would read, "who venture to new worlds for peace."
Obscure and unclear.
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