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Cyber Junkie

Member since 2003 · Posted 16 Sep 2003 · Edited 17 Sep 2003 · 8 comments

Iâm am a slut to lifeâs conjuncture A symptom of conjecture The human condition Iâm sick with it We stink of it And wallow in it happily Merrily dancing in shit Like the pigs from which we eat Devouring our very form As it lies beneath our feet Reflecting our purity Or the illusion of it Man and beast are but severed by our thoughts Nothing short of time can commend the dying And everything between us is a lie âTis life of which I speak this manor of it fades into the night as into day not walking, but falling we are and laughing still today where many men have faced their dreams and children in their nightmare days would scream thereâs little left to assume between our very own connections and I am rotting inside beside you With a wisp of wanting breath I die Into the depths of my own conception Dance with me my devil child Dance We are superstars and no one else can see us Jack in cyber junkie Iâve got what you need On your knees I said On Your Knees!

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mean 5.80 weighted 5.10 rank 6093 views 254 View voting details →

5 votes so far. Yours would make 6.5 votes so far

8 comments

[7] nentwined 16-Sep-03/12:51 PM Reply

not bad. a couple stumbles, but enjoyable. [[I'm am but a slut?]]

[n/a] J.B. Manning › nentwined 17-Sep-03/9:30 AM Reply

Thanks! I edited it. HAHA, I hate when I let those overly poetic attempts to sound mystifying get in the way of real writing.

[8] http://mulberryfairy 16-Sep-03/4:06 PM Reply

I like all of the references to rotting and impurity, it reminds me of those internet addicts who work as TA's in college computer labs with their greasy, unbathed appearances and smells- you know the ones who hang out in the lab even when they are off the clock. Exactly.

[8] Bachus 16-Sep-03/11:01 PM Reply

Yep, but pray tell? What if I sold my knees last week for twenty five quail eggs and an omellette named 'what was that whistle'?

[7] nentwined 17-Sep-03/9:36 AM Reply

pleasantly fun. a couple points where I'm not sure if you meant what you say or not (manor or manner? both make sense... "a wisp of wanting breath?" waning? or... I can kinda see wanting, but not quite a wisp of it. leaning towards wanting "separated by our thoughts" to be "separated by our thought" ...

"die" into the depths, or "dive" into the depths? cna see both, but it's not entirely clear that it's not a typo.

7.5, leaning towards 7 for now.

[n/a] J.B. Manning › nentwined 17-Sep-03/10:48 AM Reply

Manner is correct, die is correct also...it's kind of a tricky line meant to mean what it means as it's writen, whatever it means to you.

Thanks

[7] nentwined › J.B. Manning 17-Sep-03/10:52 AM Reply

i was afraid of that. :)

lines are a bit too tricky, just because I'd rather be sure you mean what's written when reading. But ... that could just be how my mind is working at the moment. I enjoyed the poem regardless. :)

[6] Quarton 3-Jul-04/10:43 AM Reply

Some pretty good lines in this and interesting
enough to hold my interest.