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The Well (Free verse) by Caducus
The well is now dry, Yet the bucket keeps coming, Falling in to darkness. Wishes drowned in silver. Ageing Queens weigh me down. A distant circle of light, But the miry walls keep me trapped, There is a ladder, But I’ve forgotten how to climb. (inspired by Jeremi Handrinos)

Up the ladder: Refulgent
Down the ladder: Mother

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 7.571429
Weighted score: 5.6915636
Overall Rank: 1966
Posted: August 13, 2003 2:00 AM PDT; Last modified: August 13, 2003 12:07 PM PDT
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Comments:
[9] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 | 13-Aug-03/1:16 PM | Reply
The well is dry.
Yet, buckets keep coming.
Falling into that blackhole.

Wishes & drowning shimmering coins.
Aged leaders weighing me down.
Distant circles of light.
But miry walls keep me trapped.
There was a ladder.
But I've long since hit bottom."

Thank you, I did an edit for you too. feel free to pick and choose from any components i've modifeid or introduced. I am very flattered as always, and am your friend.
[n/a] Caducus @ 195.92.168.167 > Bachus | 13-Aug-03/2:46 PM | Reply
Thanks,
I like the ages leaders and shimmering coins, yours and mine signify drowning under other peoples wishes in the shape of queens or dead presidents.

I'm sorting myself out now and thanks for the shoulder again.
[9] basit_i @ 209.148.203.210 | 13-Aug-03/10:04 PM | Reply
Great. More elaboration on the last four lines, perhaps, might have added something still more?
Just a thought.
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