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God is a Lady (Free verse) by thepinkbunnyofdoom
She used to run with the devil But they broke ties when she got pregnant He left her messages but got no reply She was too busy raising her children To even pay her old friend a call They used to room together in college Stayed up all night, drinking and having a good time Talking bout the joys of life and professing love Now she sits alone in her climate controlled high rise apartment Surrounded by photographs of better days and kitties galore She get many calls still but enjoys other's misery I used to write her, and every now and then she'd pull a few strings for me Now she'd rather play with mine

Up the ladder: Jaded
Down the ladder: Three Brothers

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 43
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 11

Arithmetic Mean: 7.7777777
Weighted score: 6.388889
Overall Rank: 794
Posted: August 7, 2003 11:56 AM PDT; Last modified: August 31, 2003 1:40 PM PDT
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Comments:
[9] DreamerSupreme @ 204.31.169.3 | 7-Aug-03/12:28 PM | Reply
misery.. btw, the use of the enter key to perhaps shorten the length for each verse would make it neat, and easier to read, also more comprehendible (if done right)

other than that, its a very good captured emotional image. not sure about the last two lines though.

I think the title sucks.. need a better one.
overall: 8, perhaps a nine with clean up and better title.
[9] DreamerSupreme @ 204.31.169.3 > DreamerSupreme | 7-Aug-03/12:33 PM | Reply
oh yeah.. pregnant, Surrounded.. you know, horus once told me a story about the difference between a mature poet and a street poet.. the gist of it was that the street poet cooks up his work in a quick rush, making an eggs benedict cooked in the shell.

The mature poet takes his time in perfecting his work, making sure it isnt a new age hardboiled egg hes dishin out..

http://www.spellcheck.net/ <- this shit works..
[n/a] thepinkbunnyofdoom @ 24.209.21.223 > DreamerSupreme | 7-Aug-03/12:53 PM | Reply
Horus would know. Check it out now.
[9] DreamerSupreme @ 204.31.169.3 > thepinkbunnyofdoom | 7-Aug-03/12:59 PM | Reply
Good Job!.. im still waiting for a better title, but screw it, heres a nine. hey, wutcha think of my attempt to do a horus style parody?
[n/a] Retaliate @ 164.67.82.153 | 7-Aug-03/12:51 PM | Reply
Not much of a lady if she's playing with yours, is she? :)
[9] http://mulberryfairy @ 216.195.144.106 | 7-Aug-03/7:05 PM | Reply
I like the image of god's highrise apt. with pictures of kitties. Couple of typos:
"She get(S) many calls still
but enjoys other's (should be others') misery"
[9] New Life Drug @ 67.112.120.11 | 7-Aug-03/9:55 PM | Reply
awesome title. great poem. The relationship portrayed between the devil and..well..God as the lady is very good. the phrase "kitties galore" kinda scares me though..hahaha the pink bunny rules!!!
[8] EAger to Offend @ 65.95.228.20 | 8-Aug-03/4:12 PM | Reply
Bunny, this is your best work that I have seen since I've been on here. You actually seem to have "grown" with this one. Nice solid sentences, refreshingly void of vanity.
This is your new benchmark. Congrats!!
[n/a] thepinkbunnyofdoom @ 24.209.21.223 > EAger to Offend | 8-Aug-03/4:38 PM | Reply
Thanks. I'd like to think that I've grown with every poem I've posted, but this is really a new spurt I guess. Thanks again.
[8] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 8-Aug-03/8:19 PM | Reply
There you go #1. Now you can never say I never did nothing for you. Oh, and he's not a lady. He's an alien monkey head in a palanquin that likes to fuck with the Israelites and ragheads.Why I'm here to watch? Is the last of my worrys, and honestly, bores me to death and why religion is an utter waste of time and only works to seperate us as humans, more than color or sex ever will.
[n/a] thepinkbunnyofdoom @ 24.209.21.223 > horus8 | 8-Aug-03/8:52 PM | Reply
Thank you very much indeed Horus, and I agree. Only I think He likes to make it more personal than that. He likes to toy with them down on a sick perverted almost hostile, and definately Deranged level. He is most certainly a Jew.
[10] DurtKL @ 68.75.20.171 | 8-Aug-03/11:32 PM | Reply
whoa....i've been gone for a few days and when i come back three poems in the top ten!
poemranker never fails to surprise...
- 10 -
[9] Caducus @ 195.92.168.164 | 14-Aug-03/1:05 PM | Reply
Fuck me you've come on leaps and bounds Pinkbuns, heres a 9 and congrats on the top 10
[10] Dan garcia-Black @ 66.218.41.143 | 14-Aug-03/10:38 PM | Reply
Ohhhh Yeah! That's what I'm talkin' bout. Rather, what you're talking about that resonates superbly. Better than a good idea. It's a good idea well presented. 10
[7] deleted user @ 195.93.34.14 | 16-Aug-03/4:11 PM | Reply
ok.. i guess not worthy of being the best, but none of these are, infact really too much... well i dont know im not a proffessor of english i jsut dont like it. 7 above average
[n/a] <{Baba^Yaga}> @ 24.126.113.154 | 17-Aug-03/6:45 PM | Reply
God is my down swing.

http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/pics6/legume3/legume3TN/_enemy.html
[n/a] deleted user @ 24.222.81.233 | 18-Aug-03/2:38 PM | Reply
please rank my kitty
her bum is full of air
I think your poems are sh---y
but I am rank with mant-tties
[8] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 18-Aug-03/2:50 PM | Reply
Ha Ha, I thought you were going to say because I'm "BBQin Manatees", Tom, that would have been a cackle aye? the pirates life and spackle for me, and a stinky cup of rumpee for a rupee. I gotz mesome RUbards.
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