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only pleasure left (Free verse) by richa
A child does not need to squat on the rug, to look up to you grandma She does not condescend to hear your words, wrongly chosen When you talk, of your 'only pleasure that is left' she does not seek to question, Well take it from someone sat beside you, who can see the 'only' Part of the sentence, and your slouched bones, collapsed as a fire

Up the ladder: Send The Devil...
Down the ladder: Departing Suburbia

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Arithmetic Mean: 8.0
Weighted score: 6.5
Overall Rank: 692
Posted: June 24, 2003 10:33 AM PDT; Last modified: June 24, 2003 1:21 PM PDT
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Comments:
[10] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 24-Jun-03/12:52 PM | Reply
To dark for no reason, remove your last sentence entirely, and it would find the lowest level, trust me, I know.
[10] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 24-Jun-03/1:44 PM | Reply
Precisely.
[10] SupremeDreamer @ 69.19.183.149 | 24-Jun-03/6:50 PM | Reply
Indeed, beautiful work.
[9] Mr Pig @ 195.92.168.169 | 26-Jun-03/2:02 PM | Reply
Keep it all, its dandy. (and besides your so methodical I bet you its all been sorted prior to it being on here
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