Dirge

Member since 2002 · Posted 13 Jun 2003 · 6 comments

I have desired to go Where ships not sail, Where all shall be well And words not fail I have desired to be Twelve miles out to sea So the incessant lies Will be of my own demise I have thought that I could Evade what I know So I will not be me, But that cannot be, so â I have desired to view My mind on a platter While analysts proclaim What might be the matter I know nothing about it, We all atrophy still While my brain is decaying Both in freedom and will One day this destruction Will work its way loose â For now I spend long days Under trees Reading Proust Yet I have desired to know An illusory place Born out of my lies Where ships do sail And words cannot fail Where all shall be well And nothing new can be found Inside of my mind.

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mean 5.50 weighted 5.13 rank 5560 views 202 View voting details →

6 votes so far. Yours would make 7.6 votes so far

6 comments

[7] Mona Lisa 13-Jun-03/6:21 AM Reply

Nice enough but the punch you packed was short of winding me 7

[8] INTRANSIT 13-Jun-03/8:01 AM Reply

battling the atrophy of a learned response culture.

[n/a] Nicholas Jones › INTRANSIT 16-Jun-03/1:31 AM Reply

Something like that. It's about transcendence. See if you can spot the intertextual references.

[9] horus8 13-Jun-03/10:38 AM Reply

A promise.

[n/a] Jeremi B. Handrinos 13-Jun-03/2:30 PM Reply

I would totally lose the last line, and end at found.

[n/a] Nicholas Jones › Jeremi B. Handrinos 16-Jun-03/1:25 AM Reply

I think I agree, I'm not really happy with the ending. In fact the whole thing is a work in progress. The best line is the first one, and I borrowed that from Gerard Manley Hopkins. It came into my head, and I thought I'd written it, but then I remembered it came from somewhere else. But then I used it anyway; it seemed to make sense.