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Perversions 3: Payback (Limerick) by razorgrin Midgets
A lusty young lady named Bridget
Who desired carnal love with a midget
Late at night, by the wharf
She diddled a dwarf
Who made her erotically fidget.
Bestiality
Clem, living down on the farm
Caused the animals much undue harm
When asked why he'd creep
To make love to the sheep
He'd sigh "It's because of their charm!"
Necrophilia
Ed found his joy 'tween the thighs
of girls whose souls were in the skies
"Though sometimes it's cold
and smelly," we're told
"No one has complained of my size!"
Up the ladder:
Necromantic Boo-boo
Down the ladder:
Dunce in a Sack
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.7777777
Posted: January 15, 2003 9:57 AM PST; Last modified: January 16, 2003 10:44 AM PSTWeighted score: 5.740891 Overall Rank: 1819 Comments:
[9]
Tintagiles @ 207.179.173.126
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15-Jan-03/10:08 AM
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Reply
You are a sick sick sick little girl. On the other hand, as we all know, that's why I loves you. I don't think this is my favourite set, but lovely nonetheless. (Well... lovely... you know what I mean.)
[n/a]
razorgrin @ 192.197.141.108
> Tintagiles
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15-Jan-03/10:11 AM
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Thank you. i'm now into week 2 with very little sleep. This and cookies are all I have left. And Deviance class. I may submit these for credit, if I can.
[9]
Tintagiles @ 207.179.173.126
> razorgrin
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15-Jan-03/10:18 AM
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Reply
I'll have the great joy of spending the afternoon in Sociology. I can't believe that was all there was left for me to take. On the other hand, it's a huge class, and all the notes are on the Net, and we already have the final exam, so I may just write throughout it.
[n/a]
razorgrin @ 192.197.142.42
> Tintagiles
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15-Jan-03/1:14 PM
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Reply
I slept through part of stats, but we're just going over stuff from research methods, so pheh. Soc is utterly awful.
i was hoping the second one would payoff, but the third was the proof in the pudding. Zombie pudding.
I liked the first best. I wrote the second because I'm writing these in threes. Zombielicious.
sick and twisted.. what is your obsession with the abnormal???
You need serious help this poem isn't worth the time and effort you spent to think up.... an moral impression of wasted space
My obsession with the abnormal? Among other things, I am working on a double major in Psychology and Criminology. After I get my doctorate, I intend to be a criminal profiler specializing in ritual and sex crimes. As such, it is my calling. "An moral"? What the hell is "an moral"? 'amoral', perhaps? Your grasp of English stuns me with its glory. Who do you think you are to place moral judgments on me? I answer to myself alone. I need serious help, you say? Based on what? Unless you have seen my scores on the Minnesota Multiphasic test or any of the others I have done, you know jack-all. Or do you prefer psychoanalysis to behaviourism? You haven't seen enough of me to tell anything that way either sooo... long story short, eat me, wench.
what? no forensic entymology? come on now razor, that is some good shit! (oh, i guess that makes me sick and twisted to? c'est la vie.)
Forensic Entomology also called to me, but poking into minds won out over maggot farming. i wanted to be an entomologist when I was very small. yay, bugs! yay brains!
The best part is the way each limerick has a title. And the way each one is supposed to be a perversion, but the first one is "midgets". Midgets are a pervsion. hasdhasdjkhasa
yeah, so I don't know the correct term for a midget fetish. sue me.
What? I don't know it either. I was expressing my delight, not disapproval.
truly hilarious. Your wit is as honed as ever, both your reply to this idiots comment and your mastery of the limerick. bravo. 10!
thankee. I take a bow.
Razorgrin, as anyone who knows her will tell you, IS sick and twisted. That's why we all love her. We spend hour on our needs praying she'll never get serious help because it would normalise her, which would not be a good thing. Besides, the abnormal is far more interesting than the normal. I'll take poems about necrophilia over poems about McDonald's any day, wench.
Very good, but please correct 'beastiality' to 'bestiality'. You must realise it's not even a pun, since they're derived from the same root.
I just noticed that I misspelled it. eek! I am actually blushing with embarassment. i fix it now.
Ewww, you dirty bastard! Bad doggy, bad!
"Bitch", dear. I'm a lady. I just showered this morning. I smell like Herbal Essences, soap and ginger lip gloss. As such, I'm not dirty. I am, however, a truly awful person.
Are you talking about Ed Gein?
anyway... You need serious help this poem isn't worth the time and effort you spent to think up.... an moral impression of wasted space
The last one is abut ed gein. If you picked it up, doesn't that suggest a little about your mental state?
I am amoral. Just to set the record straight, I am a modified hedonist/autotheist. As nothing in the universe has inherent value, I am free to give it whatever value I deem fit. This is better than the bible! better than ayn rand! better than the beatles!
It's not nice to show the war you're living inside.
get rid of "who" in the first one,
and th elast one, while the premise is good, doesn't seem to flow as well as the others. overall, an 8
You said i was like charles manson? Like you have room to talk. your creepy. But oddly enough i find this poem so funny i gave it a ten. now i need to go gouge me eyes out for reading this.
I am indeed creepy. Creepier when you see me. Your writing is reminiscent of Chuckie M., yes. You focus too much on the helter-skelter. I was more inspired by Issei Sagawa, Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, de Sade (you should read more), the music of Nick Cave and of Tom Waits and a personal fascination for the goddess Kali and the Aghori sect of Hinduism. And Surrealism and Dada.
Whoa, this is quite....ummm....interesting.
All of them seem to work well but the last one. nice job, what fetish is next?
I just wanted to write about Ed Gein. I can't tell what will be next, that would spoil the surprise. Keep out of my kitchen until the next batch of kink-cookies are baked.
ZERO ZERO ALL of it
I noticed. say, Jew-Killah, would you be such an utter asscock if I hadn't told you that you can't write for shit? No, you wouldn't. Grow the fuck up, I say again, at the risk of being repetitive.
Better than most of the garbage listed under limericks here so 5/10
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