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Februarys mother (Free verse) by INTRANSIT The Sun flower reaches for us
as we lay between the evergreen trees
on a silken bed of autumn leaves.
Our bodies intertwine the
Indian wind as it blows tender over us.
I tickle the water as I swim upstream
the salmon river.
All the while knowing we will never
awaken until September.
Up the ladder:
The spleenless poet
Down the ladder:
breathe on me?
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.125
Posted: December 31, 2002 5:47 AM PST; Last modified: April 11, 2003 5:39 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.302559 Overall Rank: 3667 Comments:
Hi,i would like to invite you to join my poetry group at Studencenter.org,if you are interested just tell me.
February's mother is cold and unforgiving, not like mine thank goodness. I like the line of the indian wind, I too have used similar connotations in my poem lovers lane, your work is often majestic but sometimes I think by shortening some of your work you deprive us of enough. Its hard to put more light on it, what do you think kind sir? 7
I would love you to read a poem Richa wrote about butterflies, wonderful language, it inspired me for my next poem.
Sorry if one appears a fringe intrusive, just trying to help you, because I think your a gentleman.
Dear Mr In-transit.
A formal request for you to please offer any thoughts on my recent posting. Kind Regards Laurence. aka Mr Pig
"awaken until September" reach September. or, survive the journey.
Nice, cant pick any faults
Maybe a bit short I think a killer line might make this poem, I hope you find one
awesome, awesome, awesome. talent you hold with the greatest regards. dr.
something about it touches me alhtough i can't really tell whut.
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In this case, what the words meant to you also carried with me.