poemranker ::Handy Smurf by Bachus

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Haiku № 24693

Handy Smurf

Member since 2002 · Posted 11 Nov 2002 · 15 comments

Smarter than the rest. I save the village. Again. No thank you, smurfette.

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mean 6.26 weighted 6.20 rank 981 views 298 View voting details →

19 votes so far. Yours would make 20.19 votes so far

15 comments

[7] <~> 11-Nov-02/5:58 PM Reply
how'd he get that name anyway....hmmm
[8] deleted user 12-Nov-02/12:52 AM Reply
I always thought there would be a lot of sexual frustration in the smurf world, I mean, was smurfette just the village bicycle or what?
And don't tell me smurfs don't get sexual urges
[7] brazen 12-Nov-02/4:46 AM Reply
the smurfs are commies. they all wear exactly the same clothes, except the leader papa smurf is in red. gargamel is supposed to be the stereotypical jew with his cat azrael, or maybe something similar. either way, just a thought. did i mention that the creator of the show was apparently a member of the KKK and a Nazi supporter? sorry, just bored and thought i'd spread the gossip.
[n/a] horus8 12-Nov-02/10:43 AM Reply
okay the plan...us real street savy deserving poets like d.a and z and the brazester and nentwined the wall buster and all of those others and babs and p&k and razora and... well fuckit even blade. we're gonna bomb than anthrax than anal cunt kick this guy SMichaels@poetry.com because he crawled out of my t.v last night and toe nailed my cocker spaniel. what the fuck is this cads problem...he will not fucking give up!FUCKING CHISEL CHESTED MARSHMALLOW FONDLER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and you can never e-mail the guy..he is apparently unreachably above us..he needs to die as soon as supernaturally possible..this is a job for the necronomican.
[7] <~> › horus8 12-Nov-02/11:36 AM Reply
um okay. can i wear my catwoman suit?
[n/a] Bachus › <~> 13-Nov-02/12:44 PM Reply
only if i can wear it with you. and speak chinese with my left hand. how are you these days?
[n/a] -=SeTTle=- › horus8 18-Nov-02/10:31 PM Reply
CAN I SLEEP ON YOUR COUCH AND ROCK OUT TO EVERY LED ZEPPELIN TRACK OVER 6 MINUTES LONG??? READ MY NEW POEM BECAUSE IT ROCKS LIKE A FUCKING AIRCRAFT CARRIER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO IS THIS GUY ANYWAY!!!!!! AND SO THIS IS HOW THE PISS STREAMS DOWN MY FACE, MORE PISS THAN HAS EVER BEEN, I AM A TRAVELLER OF BOTH TIME AND SPACE TO SEE THE PISS I HAVE SEEN!!!!!!!!!
[n/a] Bachus › -=SeTTle=- 18-Nov-02/11:45 PM Reply
get ahold of yourself! okay, but only if you can tell me what jimmy's symbol meant on led zep 4. why you screaming these days anyhoe...is it your new gimmick?
[2] Tintagiles 12-Nov-02/11:22 AM Reply
What the devil? Since when has there been one smurf smarter than the others?

Oh, wait, this must be on the TV show or something. I'll stick to the originals, thanks.
[10] razorgrin 12-Nov-02/11:40 AM Reply
okeedo! i'll bring the lube and the shining trapezohedron!
[9] Tascobar 15-Nov-02/5:02 AM Reply
This is fantastic. 9. A gem of a haiku, on a politically and socially relevant issue. I almost came. Almost.
[5] daniella 18-Nov-02/6:56 PM Reply
i guess i should have paid more attention to the smurfs thang.
[n/a] Bachus › daniella 18-Nov-02/11:47 PM Reply
if you say so.
[9] Robert K Foster 10-Jun-03/9:46 AM Reply
I love the smurf collection.
[n/a] horus8 › Robert K Foster 10-Jun-03/12:59 PM Reply
Thank you, and congratulations on your haiku success by the way.