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The Way It Is (Haiku) by Tascobar A fat child, taunted.
Harsh words, spoken without thought.
Law of the Playground
Up the ladder:
The ONE
Down the ladder:
--
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.142857
Posted: October 16, 2002 9:49 AM PDT; Last modified: October 16, 2002 9:52 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.104437 Overall Rank: 6023 Comments:
[0]
poetandknowit @ 67.40.59.139
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16-Oct-02/9:50 AM
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Reply
Fat kids get what they deserve. The title is a Bruce Hornsby song not a haiku title.
'Spoken without thought'? My foot. If it's spoken without thought, then it's not a taunt. It's a spoken thought. Taunts are thought up and used deliberatly. Like what I'm saying now.
Quite correct. But look again, young infidel. 'Twas not the taunt which is spoken without thought, but the harsh words. When being pedantic, please also try to be accurate. That's all, comrade.
then sitting hard pon the teeter totter. the fat kid launches the autistic boy with the prostetic leg and head gear over the chain link fence and into oncoming traffic. the blow of a horn. tire screech. the crunch of wood and plastic. the stink of sliding rubber. jesus christ! i have never seen a retards helmet roll that far. until now.
I have capture the Spawn of Bachus. I am taking him to the Castle of Carl the Republican. I will feed him Famous Stars til he poops his Batmans. Caio for now.
yeah... everyone picks on the fat kid and I don't know why... somebody should teach that kid how to fight back :o)
Not bad but seems a bit bland. Needs more vitality but still a 5 from your poem I derive.
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