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The wait (Free verse) by aliena
I waited and waited Thinking, with each passing year The verse that would come forth Would be better. Not writing was good- It was just waiting. One fine day,I found That wisdom had wiped off poetry Peace and stillness overtaken joy.

Up the ladder: why there are no virgins
Down the ladder: Into the Shadows I Crawl

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.3333335
Weighted score: 4.9205313
Overall Rank: 9472
Posted: June 18, 2007 12:34 AM PDT; Last modified: June 18, 2007 12:34 AM PDT
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Comments:
[5] Skamper @ 202.6.130.121 | 19-Jun-07/2:22 AM | Reply
"The verse that would come forth"
seems a little clumsy - I think it's the "that would come" not sure about it. It mucked up the flow for me. Also, you could drop the 'that' from the second to last line. I liked the musings within this piece.
[8] Ranger @ 81.152.176.129 | 21-Jun-07/5:07 AM | Reply
The voices in my head are crying 'image! image!' Perhaps play around with the sound of 'poetry' and make it sound like 'pottery' - something being wiped off clay. I'd like that.
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