Free verse № 146475
You
There are tough days
when life's a dead end,
when worldly struggles
upon me descend
when I've reached the limits
of human patience
and all that I live for
keeps caving me in;
It's moments like these
God sends me His force
To make me feel loved,
His presence so close,
He sends me an angel
To guide me along,
To freshen my heart
To sing me a song,
To give me the courage
To do what is right,
Help lend me a hand
or show me the light.
And when least expected
new doors He opens
an angel to guide me
and boldly step in.
It may be your smile,
it may be your word,
An angel you might be
in this big bad world.
8 comments
Line 22 - change round to 'He opens new doors' (sounds incredibly forced at the moment)
Last line...'big bad' is a little trite, this poem needs a killer endline to really knock us for six.
I have to say, though, I'm glad to see you posting again - it's good to be able to rely on someone to post lighthearted and all-round nice poetry :-)
"new doors He opens"
there is no rhyme that it is matching up with, but the effect of the flow is rather devastating. perhaps rework it to a more "normalized" sytax?
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