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10/8 (Free verse) by cronus
I have sacrificed all that I loved in the arms of an uncaring god you may say that I've gone too far but I know its not nearly enough

Down the ladder: Ebony shadow

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Arithmetic Mean: 5.25
Weighted score: 5.029801
Overall Rank: 7367
Posted: October 8, 2005 10:35 AM PDT; Last modified: October 8, 2005 10:35 AM PDT
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Comments:
[7] Dovina @ 209.247.222.92 | 8-Oct-05/12:54 PM | Reply
Another God-hating poem written by a sadsack who thinks God has dun him in. Not that different from some of David's poems.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 69.134.78.74 > Dovina | 9-Oct-05/8:45 AM | Reply
King David?
[7] Dovina @ 209.247.222.94 > ALChemy | 9-Oct-05/6:46 PM | Reply
Yes, try reading the sad ones.
[6] zodiac @ 212.118.19.108 > Dovina | 10-Oct-05/3:45 AM | Reply
And he's dead.
[7] Dovina @ 216.117.239.186 > zodiac | 10-Oct-05/6:06 PM | Reply
God or David?
[6] zodiac @ 212.38.134.51 > Dovina | 11-Oct-05/6:08 AM | Reply
The line should have read, "Not that different from some of David's poems," AND HE'S DEAD. I considered changing it, but I'd already clogged your email with slight revisions and, appearances aside, I actually do love you better than that.
[7] Dovina @ 209.247.222.91 > zodiac | 11-Oct-05/8:13 PM | Reply
Whenever I untangle some strand of the ball that is how you think, I find ten more mismatched, twisted and exasperatingly funny.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 > Dovina | 12-Oct-05/5:31 AM | Reply
My dad'a like that. He'll formulate a group of thoughts in his head and not realize which thoughts he actually spoke and which one's stayed unspoken in his head. He's been known to quite literally start a story or conversation right in the middle as if you had been talking for the last 15 minutes on it (and you just blacked out or something) because in his head he has been talking.

Not saying that Zodiac is like this. I think he just sometimes thinks on a higher plain than us, like Denver or space.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 69.134.78.74 | 9-Oct-05/8:44 AM | Reply
Why do I think of Bon Jovi's "Dead or Alive" when I read this?
We may never know.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 69.134.78.74 | 9-Oct-05/8:47 AM | Reply
If you sacrificed all that you loved then you can't love god. You can't blame him for not caring.
[6] zodiac @ 212.118.19.108 | 10-Oct-05/5:40 AM | Reply
Suggestion: Start sacrificing things you don't love. It's a long shot, but sacrificing what you love doesn't seem to have worked anyway, and what've you really got to lose?
[n/a] cronus @ 69.119.168.109 > zodiac | 8-Mar-06/8:25 AM | Reply
You're the only person who understood this remotely. Other people think I'm blaming God. The meaning was that I've sacrificed all that I love, and some would say its going too far, but I know its not enough. God is not to blame, its that what I've given him isn't worthy enough.
[n/a] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 > cronus | 8-Mar-06/9:36 AM | Reply
The problem is, you call God uncaring. If he doesn't care, then it won't matter a jot what you sacrifice - nothing will be enough, because there isn't an 'enough' to achieve. I'd suggest changing 'uncaring' to pretty much anything else. Then it will become a little clearer.
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