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Arson (Free verse) by Roisin
Bridge soaked in alcohol I lit the match finality in view. I saw your face as the blaze began, tears from the heat, eyes half closed. I watched in silence as timber blackened, quivered then fell. You and I previously entwined At once became islands.

Up the ladder: Things
Down the ladder: Grieving

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
10  .. 02
.. 00
.. 00
.. 41
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10
.. 01
.. 00
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Weighted score: 5.5
Overall Rank: 2652
Posted: June 21, 2005 11:28 AM PDT; Last modified: June 21, 2005 11:28 AM PDT
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[3] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ | 21-Jun-05/2:09 PM | Reply
I liked the first two lines of the 1st and 2nd stanza, and the first line in the 3rd stanza.

"Bridge soaked in alcohol
I lit the match
I saw your face
as the blaze began
I watched in silence as timber blackened."

I give my variation on your poem a -6-
[n/a] Roisin @ > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 22-Jun-05/10:10 AM | Reply
I disagree. The poem is concerned with separation and the division of two people who have become co-dependent. Your variation destroys this meaning but it would work well as a sacreligious and egotistical defamation of another artists expression. I give it a 2 (fingers up)
[3] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ > Roisin | 22-Jun-05/10:43 AM | Reply
if I thought your poetry was worth worshipping and forming tent meetings about.. then we could call what i have done sacreligious.

as for egotistical.. why of course.. aren't we all. We post on poemranker do we not?
[n/a] Roisin @ > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 23-Jun-05/6:19 AM | Reply
meglomania is different from an interest in the growth of the self.
[3] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ > Roisin | 23-Jun-05/11:59 AM | Reply
1st off.. you mispelled megAlomania.
2nd - megalomia is A psychopathological condition characterized by delusional fantasies of wealth, power, or omnipotence.

So... all that to say...huh? you go from calling me egotistical to megalomaniacal? I think you just used a big word for which you didn't know the definition to try to slam me some more. Ah well. I tried not to say it, but your poem does suck. so get over it. grow your own self.
[n/a] Roisin @ > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 24-Jun-05/5:49 AM | Reply
I apologise that I mispelt a word- us humans slip up on the odd occasion...thank you your grace for allowing me to see the error of my ways. I do not however agree on what you say concerning my use of the word. Egotistical describes someone who has a high concern for his own needs or an excessively high view of himself. A megl(A)maniac is someone who is similar but the definition also entails the attempted lowering down of other people in pursuit of gain (be it material or other). Like the difference between standing upon a rock to see over a wall and using two peoples heads to hoik yourself up with. Do you see the difference now or is it all too much for you to comprehend that there may be a subtle but crucial difference between two words? As for your definition I don't know which internet site you got it from but as fas as I know it is not a psychopathological condition which would mean that the person does not comprehend any form of morality of sense of empathy, it could not possibly be for the conditions would be mutually exclusive. In order to crave power you must be able to equate with other human beings in order to wish to be up a level from them. It is actually a psychological condition. Maybe you are guilty of a mistake of your own...who knows? Thank you for sparing me from your ultimate insult for so long, that last arrow in your quiver that was sure to ruin me. I SUCK... Oh shit...please let the grand sea rise and swallow me up for I have no worth left here. Grow a brain young american child (an assumption based on you turn of phrase).
[3] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ > Roisin | 24-Jun-05/11:14 AM | Reply
I never said that you suck. simply that your crappy poem sucked. It is still bad whether or not you slay me with your many words. I do empathize with you. I understand your lonely bitterness; your attempt at being bigger than yourself through a false sense of intellectual superiority. It's funny, but your responses are the ones that have the tinge of self-possessed mania. Your assumption that I'm a child, and your three hundred word response to a child makes me think you are a pederast. Play on, puppy.
[n/a] Roisin @ > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 24-Jun-05/7:17 PM | Reply
Well, I'm female so definately not a pederest...Why do you think I may be making a sexual play for you...perhaps spurred on by your seductive word play. I am not lonely, maybe bitter but not because of ''. I am not attempting to be bigger than myself and do not see how you can accuse me of such a thing- explain as you will? I am either as big as I appear or wrong- I allow you to disagree with any logical fallacies within my argument but slander of this type is meaningless. (Yes I hope I am self-possessed-blimey if I was possessed by any other being I may have cause to worry).
[7] deleted user @ > Roisin | 24-Jun-05/7:56 PM | Reply
>> Well, I'm female so definitely not a pederast<< (while I'm at it, allow me to rewrite the line in comprehensible English)

You yourself may not be one, but don't take your gender as a dead certainty.

[n/a] Roisin @ > deleted user | 25-Jun-05/5:11 AM | Reply
A pederest is defined as a male. If you would like to accuse me of being a kiddy fiddler then consult the dictionary once again.
[7] deleted user @ > Roisin | 25-Jun-05/10:54 AM | Reply
Don't evade the matter, Roisin. And do consult a few other books besides dictionaries.
[n/a] Roisin @ > deleted user | 25-Jun-05/8:12 PM | Reply
What matter? Are there other books except dictionaries? Perhaps you could throw a couple my way (preferably not in the face or groinal area)
[3] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ > Roisin | 25-Jun-05/12:47 AM | Reply
claiming to be female is exactly what a pederast would do in your position. This is the very thing that now makes me sure you are some sweaty, beer-swilling, male cyberstalker of boys. If you are sure enough about my gender to keep courting me, then at least make sure of my age, puppy.
[n/a] Roisin @ > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 25-Jun-05/5:19 AM | Reply can I be sure of your age? Or in fact your gender? This internet business makes it impossible to prove either (except maybe by web cam) but even then there are no certaintys. How strange the world has become... this argument, be it amusing has no place in the real world. Face to face it, I am 22 and a female and not lonely...maybe think too much and am a little unemployed and hedonistic at present with a slightly messy love life but a pedar, I think not. (I am now dribbling though at the possibility that you buy into my deception and will continue to give me masturbatory fodder)
[7] Blue Magpie @ | 21-Jun-05/10:17 PM | Reply
No bad, a little work, and the addition of a few small words could make it better.
[7] Ranger @ | 29-Apr-06/4:29 AM | Reply
Here's a suggestion: given the first two lines you could easily turn this into a poem about cards, and use that as a metaphor for arson, which in turn is a metaphor for seperation. As it is, it's not a bad poem, but I found the final line lacking in originality. Referring to people as islands has been done to death, if you could find a different way of putting it I'd like it more.
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