Help | About | Suggestions | Alms | Chat [0] | Users [0] | Log In | Join
 Search:
Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments   

On the Bank of Lake Michigan (Free verse) by jessicazee
The water we share is the way we know east, our sunrises alewived beaches. A great lake, an erection at its end, pointing downward, tired. I called it an ocean in my youth, I thought I could see across to Michigan, “An optical illusion,” my dad would say, “A puddle on a hot street, a bag on the road you think is a cat.” The sun never sets on our water, moons, though, wane and swell. We swam in storms, naked, heedless, bathed in fresh water. The beach at the zoo downwind from seals, owls, lions in heat, field trips our fathers underwent a long time ago, feeding bears cheese crackers, otters just as funny, almost touching monkey’s hands, the elephants have all grown up.

Up the ladder: HOW IT USUALLY ENDS!
Down the ladder: Diamonds & Glass

You must be logged in to leave comments. Vote:

Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 00
.. 00
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 4.0
Weighted score: 4.880797
Overall Rank: 10255
Posted: May 3, 2005 2:29 PM PDT; Last modified: May 14, 2005 2:13 AM PDT
View voting details
Comments:
[8] unknown^user @ 128.196.6.126 | 12-May-05/8:49 AM | Reply
good imagery
[8] Dovina @ 69.175.32.185 | 12-May-05/12:03 PM | Reply
Is an alwife a fish that spawns on the beach of Lake Michigan? The last line needs some help.
[8] wilco @ 24.165.207.93 | 12-May-05/6:08 PM | Reply
I like it. Could be better...I don't know exactly. I'll leave it to you...It's good as it is...or make it great.
[n/a] deleted user @ 81.69.23.196 | 13-May-05/6:05 AM | Reply
The erection at the end you call an ocean...
I get the picture, but perhaps you should put a blank line between 6 and 7 the prevent the reader from running off the stage...
[4] Stephen Robins @ 213.146.148.199 | 16-May-05/7:42 AM | Reply
Disappointing.
[8] INTRANSIT @ 205.188.116.72 | 16-May-05/8:58 AM | Reply
But what I really whant to know is: are you Hagarian or Rothian?
237 view(s)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001