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Shattered (Haiku) by Aetius Sharp-edged glass fragments:
There are things one should not touch ...
Like broken friendships.
Up the ladder:
Unbroken Horses
Down the ladder:
Mavis Beacon, Human.
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.4
Posted: October 13, 2004 4:06 PM PDT; Last modified: October 13, 2004 4:06 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.286087 Overall Rank: 3760 The following users have marked this poem on their favorites list:
Comments:
[10]
Rollsoftoiletpaper @ 205.188.117.13
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13-Oct-04/7:18 PM
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Reply
Wooooah. Dig it, man. Dig it. This is the first Haiku I've ever read in my life...that I actually liked. 10 for me.
Excellent, but I don't think punctuation improves on haikus. Meaningful and thought provoking, friends are such rare and fragile things.
I agree that the punctuation is not needed.
Haikus are supposed to be 5-7-5, thus the "There are" in line 2. But those words are so trite here that I'd omit them. Otherwise good. 226 view(s)
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