Re: a comment on A Cold by Niphredil	18-Mar-06/2:28 PM
'The Demons of my Agues'? Great fun, this little ode... 'Enough! or else I shall be drenched!' Marvellous
Re: Majdanek by Niphredil	18-Mar-06/2:25 PM
Powerful; the imagery in the last 5 lines could possibly be brought out a bit more. Not sure about 'timber creaked with evil'...it doesn't really creak with evil - timber creaked despairingly, maybe?
Re: Black Belt by etherealmaiden	18-Mar-06/2:21 PM
This is cool, nicely concise - fast as though struggling for breath (due to the belt being too tight). There are a couple of places where I'd change word choices purely for rhythmical reasons - 'couples all around' I'd change to 'couples around', 'I must lose weight' would work better as 'I have to lose weight', but to be fair these are just small issues. Overall, not bad!
Re: a comment on Mid-July by Ranger	18-Mar-06/11:19 AM
Ah, no I think I phrased that comment awkwardly. In the poem, she's the protagonist's daughter. But there's no correlation to any real-life event that I know of.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/10:11 AM
So? Make of it what you wish. Maybe it shows a supremely creative designer, maybe it shows that all our inclinations are entirely deterministic, maybe it shows that God set up a working system of nature, and this is the result. I wouldn't presume to say. I was merely making an observation. Don't forget, ALChemy, that I believe in God. I'm on your side! However, the notion that God could make people want to sing 'It's Raining Men' puts a serious dent in my belief of supreme intelligence...or at least, supreme taste...
Re: a comment on Mid-July by Ranger	18-Mar-06/9:59 AM
*beams roundly* You've picked up on the major points that I was (and still am) concerned about (I did notice 'lay' was wrong, why I didn't change it is beyond me...) I wasn't sure whether or not I could get away with 'reprise'...I thought maybe I could twist the meaning a little for it (renewal of life, perhaps) but I don't think it works. With the Cerberus part, I was talking about the girl (not my daughter, if I have one I'm certainly not aware of her!) The initial draft was 'For it seemed that Hell assembled/Cerberus, her eyes resembled', as if I were seeing the underworld in her dying stare, but I felt that 'Hell' was a little too...well, pimply for this piece. As ALChemy said; this piece will probably take about a million more edits to get right. Thanks for all the feedback so far!
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/9:46 AM
Have to continue my reply in a new box...it's too long for one post. 'Why bother with art if it's impractical?' - Because it's nice. Because it's a luxury. What's the point in an existence that has no niceties? Without the creative nuances, life would be extremely monotonous and boring. But there's no logical connection between wanting to amuse ourselves and believing that art comes from God directly. I probably sound like an uber-sceptic here; I'm actually not and I place a certain amount of stock in spirituality. I think that God set this all up, and set down rules by which we should abide. I just don't think He is the direct cause of absolutely everything. Like natural disasters being 'evil'. What's that all about? Earthquakes, tsunamis etc. can have tragic consequences, but they aren't inherently evil. In fact, I take a pretty zodiac-esque view of life; I see no reason why God should get me out of a situation that I can't deal with myself. Sermon over; hit me with anything that I didn't answer properly.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/9:44 AM
Sorry if I seem like I'm dodging, I'm not great at answering 'big' questions directly. This time tomorrow I'll probably be struck by a brilliant response. Morality - I don't doubt that my upbringing contributed plenty to how I act, but I honestly don't believe it could have made me as determined to be 'moral' as I actually am. And why is God necessary? Well without an ultimate arbitrator, why on earth shouldn't I go round eliminating all the people I don't like? Or on a more practical level, if we really were stuck in an existential hole, why should I even be nice to people? Yes, if I never had wings and saw a play where people were flying I probably would think it was awesome. But never in my life have I actually believed it could happen. I used to think it would be awesome to be a scorpion, but I never believed I could become one. And I stick by what I said: if someone had never - and I mean never - experienced love, they might well be amazed at the idea of it and want to go and find out if it was real, but they wouldn't believe with absolute certainty that it did exist. Belief in the possibility of X doesn't equate to belief in X. Indeed there are truly gifted people. I know a few. And with those gifts seems to come a drawback. The most intellectually, musically and physically gifted person I know also happens to be suicidally depressed. Now to me that makes no sense. If God took an active hand in dealing out gifts, I'm pretty sure that He wouldn't be so wasteful as to put such contradictory traits together. It would make more sense if an average person like myself, who probably won't make any impact on the world, were to have to contend with the darker psychological issues, while those who will make a difference were free to actually make that difference. So I don't think that genius comes directly from God. And as for the individuals you named 'transcending us mere mortals'...well Jordan could kick my ass at basketball (to be fair, that's not saying much) and probably at every other physical activity. But - and I really don't want to sound arrogant here - I'm prepared to bet that I'm better at creative writing than him. And da Vinci...intellectually I'm less than microscopic in comparison, but if we were living at the same time, I'd love to take him on at football. There is no such thing as a person who is universally better than everyone else, so no - they don't transcend us. In a similar vein, their abilities didn't just appear overnight. They had to work for them. The potential might have been innate to them, but if Jordan had never worked out, would he have been able to stun the basketball world? No, I doubt it.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/8:15 AM
R.E. 'propensities for believing in God' - there is allegedly a 'God gene', which increases the likelihood of the individual believing in God, but whether or not this is fact, I don't know.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/8:11 AM
"Are you saying that those who believe in God don't somehow feel his presence, that they believe in him because someone else said so and why not believe, it all seems so logical?" - I wouldn't know whether or not other believers genuinely feel Him. I know that I don't, I never went to Church, I never had someone teach me biblical narrative, yet I believe. Why? Through a lot of thought, and because I just have this innate feeling that I ought to lead a 'good' life. If God doesn't exist then I find no reason to believe that there is any form of morality. Make of that what you will. "Someone who hasn't been in love...Romeo and Juliet...'Yes, love is a mysterious and wonderous thing that certainly exists'" - Yes, I am saying precisely that. If someone had lived their entire life devoid of 'love', I sincerely doubt that they would be compelled to believe just through seeing a play. They might be curious enough to find out, but they wouldn't suddenly believe. What do I believe love is? That's difficult to answer. Some form of emotional and social bond through prolonged contact with a certain person, maybe? But then, I also think there's a difference between parental love, friendship love and romantic love. When I know what romantic love is, I'll let you know. And do I believe it exists? No. I believe it might exist, but again there's a difference. Art - that's trickier. Fundamentally it's the appreciation of mastery of a skill - same with sport. Metaphysically though? I'm not convinced. Seeing a painting might trigger a memory associated with a certain emotion, or might cause a train of imaginative thought...but as a connection with God? No. Similarly, when you see someone demonstrate exceptional talent at, say, football, do you think 'That is divinely inspired'? The actual quote was 'I would rather know remorse...', but I suppose your version works as well. I think I missed something out in this post...if so I'll rectify things.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/7:28 AM
Umm...I suppose you could see it that way. But then, does that not mean that everything beyond direct empirical experience is mysticism to an extent? Quantum physics, for example.
Re: a comment on Mid-July by Ranger	18-Mar-06/7:22 AM
Too true. You cannot imagine the amount of changes I've made to this, and there is still a substantial amount I want to alter.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/7:20 AM
The thing is, if 'love' is something more than a chemical reaction, if 'art' is something more than applying geometric shapes etc. (which is even more doubtful), I still think that those concepts are too abstract, too metaphysical to ever have a believable definition. Also, believing in them requires direct experience of them, does it not? Whereas I don't think that belief in God requires first-hand experience. It doesn't for me. That being said, to (sort of) paraphrase Kempis, I would rather know love than know how to define it. I'm not sure that's a good answer to your question, but I'll keep trying.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/7:04 AM
Dirty blighters.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/7:04 AM
No. Why do you draw that parallel? (I'm devising a more extended answer to the initial question, justification will follow.)
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/6:53 AM
Who knows...maybe he will. I wouldn't know who to feel more sorry for.
Re: a comment on My God by ElmoBeavisButthead	18-Mar-06/6:49 AM
Heh, go for it! Or rather, take a title (or phrase, or anything you like) and use it as inspiration for your own thoughts. Pick up a book of quotations - they are absolute goldmines of great ideas. The trick is to make it your own. I tried this in my last post ('Mid-July'), a sort of attempt at emulating Poe. Whether it worked or not is a different matter.
Re: a comment on My God by ElmoBeavisButthead	18-Mar-06/6:36 AM
Yeah, I see what you mean. It might sound a bit more...erm, arrogant, perhaps, than the poem is intended to be. Whatever you choose, try to avoid the overused ideas ('God of mine', 'God' etc.). Be as original and innovative as you possibly can - believe it or not, a really classy title is a springboard for all sorts of ideas - you could well find it giving rise to a whole host of images that you can include.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/6:31 AM
Oh - and justice (ultimate justice) is also supposed to be unavoidable according to Christianity. You'll get what you deserve in Heaven, presumably.
Re: a comment on Numbers In Heaven by Dovina	18-Mar-06/6:29 AM
Good answer. But in a perfectly just world do you think they'd equate to the same thing?