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Brush me away (Free verse) by nothingtoanyone The last piece of my has broken into an unfixable size.
An unneeded mess that lays scattered amongst the dust on the
floor.
Sweep my away as, I softly weep, Iâll pry as you sweep.
Brush it all into a neat clean pile of vile rift raft.
Into the dustpan and off to the trash never to be seen again only felt
in the dark dang home that it once came from.
Up the ladder:
misplaced
Down the ladder:
Breathless
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.0
Posted: April 26, 2004 9:40 PM PDT; Last modified: April 26, 2004 9:40 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.2384057 Overall Rank: 4064 Comments:
If you say that I have failed in the wrighting of this poem then why did you give it a -10-?
"last piece of my" - what?
again in l3 - this is on purpose, right? Why? oh - I see you've been informed already. 163 view(s)
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1. You appear to have omitted a word in line 1 between the words "my" and "has".
2. When you say, "broken into an unfixable size," do you actually mean, "broken into an unfixably small piece"?
3. You appear to have omitted a word in line 3 between the words "my" and "away".
4. When you say "rift raft," do you mean "riff raff"? If so, please consult a dictionary to discover the meaning of the phrase "riff raff" before reconsidering your use of the phrase.
5. When you say "dang," do you mean "dank"?
6. This poem fails.
7. You fail.
8. Q. E. D.
9. Thanks!
10. -10-