| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
The Day The World Blew Away (Glosa) by OfaRevolutionAJD I wonder where everything goes
When everything fades away
Do we still exist?
Or do we decay?
I wonder what happens when the world blows away
Do we blow away with it?
Or do we stay?
In a world of emptiness
Nothing is sad
Nothing is happy
Everything is blank
No fake smiles
No more lies
This is the day the world blew away
Everyone is hollow in someway
For we no longer exist
We just decay
The day the world blew away...
Up the ladder:
Sweet Dreams
Down the ladder:
Devilution
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.5454545
Posted: April 1, 2004 8:24 PM PST; Last modified: April 1, 2004 8:52 PM PSTWeighted score: 5.2727275 Overall Rank: 3802 Comments:
[7]
deleted user @ 68.169.177.107
|
2-Apr-04/6:38 AM
|
Reply
Too many redundant lines. A good thought with a touch of ambiguity.
[0]
zodiac @ 152.30.88.96
> deleted user
|
2-Apr-04/7:49 AM
|
Reply
re "Too many redundant lines": not to mention that most of them refer to the world fading/blowing away as if it were some kind of common occurence and not a mostly meaningless space-filler invented by bad post-grunge Christian rock bands to give the lighting technicians an excuse to cut all the stage-lights at once, inevitably making the crowd scream like crazy.
Five gallons in a ten gallon hat.
That is NOT a glosa
183 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
