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Vodka kisses & the final sigh, v.II (bloody vodka remix) (Villanelle) by SupremeDreamer
Scarlet burnt sky & vodka kisses goodbye; really was nice talkin 'n smokin, till our last weary mumbles & the final sigh. Fatigue our bodies can not try to deny; it's bitter 'n grim, just like sin served stiff, with vodka kisses goodbye. Our glasses are full, yet lips remain dry-- This bleedin red sky keeps burnin till our last mumbles, & final jaded sigh. Time passes, our cigars burn & slowly die; cool blue smoke starts witherin-- our hip mood swiftly vodka kiss'd goodbye. Rosy-red brow saggin, smiling, mad & sly. Killed the last warm shot of gin, before our weary mumbling & the final sigh. Rubbin my sore-achin 'n crusted left eye, as my ole belly starts a-blazin from devil sky & stiff vodka kiss goodbye-- bloody mary stirrin my last wry & tired sigh.

Down the ladder: Goodbye

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 7.6666665
Weighted score: 6.3333335
Overall Rank: 851
Posted: March 6, 2004 1:03 AM PST; Last modified: May 8, 2004 9:51 AM PDT
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Comments:
[10] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 163.1.146.225 | 8-May-04/10:24 AM | Reply
Wipe that stupid smile off your bum-like face, hand your badge back to the commissioner, get the hell out of my office, and for Christ's sake put some clothes on :( -10-
[n/a] Don-Quixote @ 204.31.170.100 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 8-May-04/12:25 PM | Reply
Whatever.
[10] INTRANSIT @ 205.188.116.68 | 8-May-04/1:13 PM | Reply
Better beat, verbage. Quite.
[6] Jill Stockinger @ 0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1 | 2-Jan-21/6:46 PM | Reply
cannot (one word) unless you think it is more "poetic" to keep them separated- I really do not think it is, I believe it just detracts from the flow.
bleedin' red...witherin'-saggin'-stirrin' ...
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