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Homeland Security (Free verse) by Lenore
It’s about survival a primitive sense of safety, well protected, and we’re ready, armed inside our fortress by the TV angered and anxious breathing slowly, taking it all in as if we were, for now, the only people on earth Who must see What others wont, Who know What has been hidden, Who are waiting silently, to take action through chaos, the inevitable product of social order, turned so far from truth, wide eyed, but seeing nothing, miss the signs of coming danger.

Up the ladder: Castle of Pandas IV
Down the ladder: The Mirror

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.25
Weighted score: 5.029801
Overall Rank: 7351
Posted: February 3, 2004 9:18 AM PST; Last modified: February 3, 2004 9:18 AM PST
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Comments:
[6] horus8 @ 24.126.116.54 | 3-Feb-04/10:43 PM | Reply
Danger, I'm sure that's someone's middle name.
[8] zodiac @ 152.30.60.178 | 4-Feb-04/11:42 AM | Reply
I'm actually with rockmage. It's pretty well-written, barring some of those punctuational things which your higher state of evolution makes you immune to. But it doesn't inspire fear. George Bush inspires fear in me. The headlong crusading of America and Britain inspires fear. This poem could. I think (gasp) it's too intellectual. And are you ending on the note that there actually IS a coming danger? Of course there isn't! On second thought, this is the kind of cadgy line-toeing that makes a famous poem. No matter what side you come from, you'll think this poem says (but not particularly well) what you think. Bravo and an 8.
[7] NanceXToo @ 24.229.216.168 | 5-Feb-04/1:41 PM | Reply
Not bad...pretty well written, but I'd echo Rockmage and Zodiac's sentiments.
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