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Come sleep with me (Free verse) by Freethinker1602
Everything was like a living dream Swept away It was gone so abruptly It spawned a troubled mind with in me Ruining all perfection Ah I the dreamer woe is me For serenity does not pulse in my veins I can close my eyes draw in a deep breath And feel you here with me I feel you kiss me, I feel you touch me, and I feel you hold me Where can I go when I want what I had And it can’t be found in a conscious state I’m desperate for you, to feel you, to see you Tell me you'll hold me because I miss you Believe me when I say I'd rather be with you Because you are superior to all others

Up the ladder: One Too Many
Down the ladder: Pane Glass Lake

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.5
Weighted score: 5.0596013
Overall Rank: 6784
Posted: January 8, 2004 6:13 PM PST; Last modified: January 8, 2004 6:26 PM PST
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Comments:
[10] nothingtoanyone @ 68.228.50.227 | 8-Jan-04/6:53 PM | Reply
I like the way you put that feeling to words.
[n/a] Everyone @ 81.86.113.159 > nothingtoanyone | 8-Jan-04/9:15 PM | Reply
That's what poetry is, assface. Putting "feeling" to "words". You've just said "I like this poeme". THAT'S WHAT THE VOTING SECTION IS FOR GROINWAGON.
[n/a] middenHeap @ 217.226.30.158 > Everyone | 11-Jan-04/6:46 PM | Reply
I'm'a have tae try dat. Usually I scrunch t' feelings up into little balls and flick'm under t' couch, but me old mam she' alway getting on m' case about that so mayhap I'll try t'other. You stick 'm intae words, y'say? How d'ye go about it 'xactly? I bin wag'n me groin t'hole day since I read this post but I cain't get no feelin's t'come out in words. 'tall comes out as t'rollin' up stuff. Please let me know soon, I got quites t' mess here.
[n/a] middenHeap @ 217.226.30.158 | 11-Jan-04/4:16 PM | Reply
When the thingy spawned inside you, what did it spawn with? I think a word is missing...
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