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School girls lovely school girls (Free verse) by ==Doylum
Bless her cotton panties and skirts so short and tight and the memorys that it gives me when I'm all alone at night Bless her cotton panties and the long legs that i see and the gym knickers so delightful they don't help me with my P.E. Bless her cotton panties when they hang upon the line so that i can take them down and have a lovely sticky time Bless her cotton panties a sign so young and pure. That i've never got anywhere near them a sign my obsession shows for sure

Up the ladder: MY BURNING RAGE
Down the ladder: City Streets

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 4.6
Weighted score: 4.8
Overall Rank: 11182
Posted: August 1, 2002 5:29 AM PDT; Last modified: August 1, 2002 5:29 AM PDT
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Comments:
[8] Agemo-Z @ 142.166.108.249 | 4-Aug-02/10:33 PM | Reply
That touched me somewhere dear.
I think it was my wee-wee.

Didn't think the 2nd verse was quite as good as the others though. Better euphamisms could be had regarding gym knickers and "P.E.".
[8] Agemo-Z @ 142.166.108.249 | 5-Aug-02/12:02 AM | Reply
Good point, Darky (you don't mind if I call you that, do you?), although some of the current Japanese schoolgirls are becoming somewhat more modern, with dyed hair (it's hip in Japan to have blonde hair now, presumeably because it makes one appear more American) and glitter. But that's not quite up to the level of spiked collar and purple hair.
[2] writteninskin @ 12.65.19.93 | 5-Aug-02/6:47 PM | Reply
Thanks for your comment. It's nice to know that people who are jealous of actual talent leave low scores and mean comments. Maybe you can find some solice in those pretty school girls eh? lol. grow up, you fucking wanker. *skipping and giggling back home*
[n/a] ==Doylum @ | 5-Aug-02/6:50 PM | Reply
Yes i take your critiques on board, however i still feel we need to take vis-a-vis the forecoming masterpiece, whoes title i have yet to finalise. CHrist I fucking love you. Opps sorry for the outburst
[8] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 | 5-Aug-02/7:13 PM | Reply
Fascinating. My sister wears cotton panties too. I like her. She makes me smile. You people make me cry. I want sister's panties. Maybe your panties too. could you skip home more to the left. So, I can touch you. Cuz I'm not right, But panties are good. Who really fucking is lacking so much attention in their sociopathic existences upon this talentless lackluster site of shite. That they would stoop to the vile sand-in-the-eye extent of writing lyrics pertaining to their twat-molder-holders. Wrenching. All true I hope? Well me for one! I choose to wear none! Yes tis true. Theyt'wereall ruined by poo
10, well how about a 5 for giving me blue balls. Guess which one I gave you. It's the same number of licks taken to achieve the middle of the tootsie-pop. Sop
[3] Robert K Foster @ 209.68.64.11 | 16-Aug-02/5:22 AM | Reply
there are some disrupted rhythms here (such as "anywhere" in 2nd to last line),you've got a potentially good sounding poem, as long as you don't let your pervesrion cloud your craft. (and it is "memories")
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