| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
Kites, Gunpowder, and a Chair (Free verse) by Geschäftsreise A parade of 100 servants, my children,
And my excitement to be one of them!
With a launch pad upon our backs
we ourselves had carefully designed
so much planning
the right chair - not too soft or uncomfortable
for such a long journey
kites - to carry the wind and propel him forward
and most important of all:
47 bamboo tubes filled with gunpowder and strapped to the chair
46 servants in addition to myself
to set fire those tubes
45 seconds until we would all light our fuses
sending Wan Hu into space - the first Chinese astronaut
Up the ladder:
Kristi's Quiescence
Down the ladder:
R'lyeh
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.111111
Posted: October 15, 2003 10:00 AM PDT; Last modified: October 15, 2003 10:00 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.5555553 Overall Rank: 2466 Comments:
[8]
<~> @ 167.206.181.179
|
15-Oct-03/10:44 AM
|
Reply
not to be televised, live.
one who?
most excerrent.
www.engrish.com
Why do I keep believing I might actually find some poetry here?
Enlighten me, effete marie.
What is this 'poetry' you seek and do not find? Is it passion? Is it shock to affect? Is it message to purpose? Is it a tongue carefully coiled around a tasty phrase? Which of these things do I not possess in abundance and been ignored by you for having it - only to find you banging on my lone whimsy wall?
Read my poem "Pauling in Disguise". You might enjoy it (being a person in search of poetry). Are you aware that this story is a true medieval Chinese legend?
Damn fine with me. 9.
Che Che Nie
Yep like it, especially the way the last line makes everything clear.
A little bit patronising and racist though.
Today, "The Sun" had an article about this, although the main focus was the fact that they'd had to invent a space-Chinese-takaway, which he had eaten in orbit around the Earth.
It's interesting that you would see it as patronizing and racist (I didn't intend it that way). But you're not the only one to think that so there must be something to it.
Have you ever heard of the story about the guy who found a jet engine and strapped it to his El Camino and launched himself into the side of a mesa wall? I used to love telling that story and I always assumed the guy was the same color as I am. I think this poem is more about how things get started, or to be succint, 'every great idea is ugly in its infancy'. I meant this as such a wide contrast to actually sending someone into space. It is a praise of the taikonauts, not a slam.
I like this a lot. I didn't think it was patronizing or racist, and I honestly don't see anything in this to suggest that it is. I think people are assuming that you're belittling the current Chinese space adventure, but obviously you're not. Even though I didn't know the legend of Wan Hu, I picked up on the intimation that this was based on legend, from the language, the storytelling voice, the fact that you named names, etc. Easy enough to find the original story; here's one telling: http://cnnstudentnews.cnn.com/2003/TECH/
Yeah, ugly in its infancy like Jules Verne's early (before his time) ideas of what space travel would look like, none too pretty those travellers would've been in their huge hollow cannonball(?)
211 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
