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Padre's Gumbo (Free verse) by SupremeDreamer
A tear drips into the stormy sea of my mind. Carried within it, is a image: The mirrored reflection of my father being buried in water and carried off into the pacific. He was a swimmer in life, receiver of the gold metal. Now he only floats, a spicy seasoning being sprinkled into the giant soup pot of earth.

Up the ladder: Icarus Down
Down the ladder: youre there...

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 7.6666665
Weighted score: 6.3333335
Overall Rank: 846
Posted: August 14, 2003 4:48 AM PDT; Last modified: August 14, 2003 4:48 AM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] richa @ 81.86.244.105 | 14-Aug-03/5:34 AM | Reply
good poem, all the images link in so well

and your signature food metaphor
[10] Lifeboatman @ 202.78.97.13 | 14-Aug-03/8:15 PM | Reply
metal? medal? works both ways.. haha.. 10
[8] sliver @ 63.191.97.237 | 14-Aug-03/8:33 PM | Reply
well done. great emotionn.
[7] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 | 14-Aug-03/8:50 PM | Reply
Weird, if you ask me.
[6] Jill Stockinger @ 127.0.0.1 | 2-Jan-21/6:14 PM | Reply
Should be no comma in the second line.
Should be- is an image- (an, not a)

You might consider using "awarded the gold medal.", instead of "receiver of the gold medal"- just a suggestion.
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