Other № 56755

Tears and Tombstones

Member since 2003 · Posted 19 Jul 2003 · 4 comments

A tear fell on my cheek today I didn't care to wipe it away I waited for your hand to turn off the hurt Like when I the didn't wake to the morning alert I'll wait while I sleep and see you while I dream I'll know it's not real no matter how you seem But in it I'll find again the comfort I need to rest The kind of comfort I got laying across your chest I don't care if they see the wet line If they don't ask I should be fine But they ask why and want me to tell They always want a personal account of Hell You don't ask a flooded farmer what he thinks of the rain Misery loves company but not when the guest brings pain So alone I sit or in dreams I lie Talking to you and imagining your reply Snow fell on your tombstone today I took off my gloves to brush it away Like when I used to push back your hair So I could see that smile on that face so fair

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mean 7.29 weighted 5.61 rank 2231 views 187 View voting details →

7 votes so far. Yours would make 8.7 votes so far

4 comments

[10] thepinkbunnyofdoom 19-Jul-03/2:50 PM Reply

Excellent writing. -10-

[5] horus8 19-Jul-03/7:40 PM Reply

I'll give you a five for the last stanza because I liked it, but it was a shitslide getting there, good christ, no wonder you've distanced it from the rest of the piece.

[n/a] OneFingerAnswer › horus8 19-Jul-03/9:03 PM Reply

How about a little bit more constructive criticism?

[7] Heather Dee 10-Sep-05/11:09 PM Reply

Very nice although I think you could have thought of a better line for "They always want a personal account of Hell"