DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

smile

Member since 2003 · Posted 10 Jul 2003 · Edited 6 Aug 2003 · 10 comments

i write the way i feel i can't tell it to your eyes i talk to a screen the emotion in your eyes scares me i am scared you aren't scary, but i think i am i think my mind is my only friend i am bitter life sucks i should be able to control mine i am confused because it is late i don't know where you are i am here alone scared there is something special in the air i kill it all as i turn on the tv i am a mindless creature i don't care i don't care i did once and was hurt i am hurt you didn't care i am left at the starting and end of a vicous circle circles are strange i like strange it is different i like differences because i am i am as you want me to be i feel with every word i shake with every hit i fight to live i live i am scared of the unknown tomorrow is the unknown aswell i am strong i still care i care as i feel the tears run down my eyes when i think of you when i think of people people talking people smiling i smile smilies are all i have

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mean 5.40 weighted 5.05 rank 6851 views 163 View voting details →

5 votes so far. Yours would make 6.5 votes so far

10 comments

[6] richa 10-Jul-03/3:59 AM Reply

not a lot of insight here and the description relies on cliche.

However I do feel a certain empathy with these feelings but that is more what I bring to the poem than you I think

[n/a] nolan › richa 10-Jul-03/11:32 AM Reply

shit...... maybe i am living on big cliche.... but aren't we all?

[n/a] nolan › nolan 10-Jul-03/11:32 AM Reply

*in one

[n/a] horus8 10-Jul-03/10:02 AM Reply

Change the last line to "and kill motherfuckers" Otherwise the rest was just pointless jerking.

[8] Luzr 10-Jul-03/10:10 AM Reply

DreamerSupreme Style. -8-
Its good but does touch on the cliche, side.

[7] Birdpia 19-Jul-03/8:25 AM Reply

in your line sixth, there's a typo "sacry" ? and erm, 'zombie' in this touching poem breaks the poem :/ but i like your wording, it makes people touching in some part.. i give you 7

[n/a] EAger to Offend 19-Jul-03/11:41 AM Reply

I respect the pathos but this really lacks focus.

[6] Crakyamuni 20-Jul-03/12:56 PM Reply

sudden infant death is harsh. I understand .

[6] http://mulberryfairy 6-Aug-03/6:41 PM Reply

I like the sort of word association feel, and the way you've demonstrated how circular thinking can be, but this is loaded with overused expressions/images.

[8] Dan garcia-Black 7-Aug-03/12:03 AM Reply

Good one. I felt just like that once-- a couple of times.