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A poem from the sky (Free verse) by Roisin
You always seemed so far away, So high up in the infinite sky. I could not see your soul. When I at first saw you in perfect clarity I would've wondered whether The distance had ever really existed Had it not been for a distinct feeling that overcame my whole And I, in turn, became entangled with it. The heady rush that swam And Dizzily Meandered through the heart of my head. I had been lifted by you. I began to see like you, Know you, Feel what you- what I Was feeling. So used to being held suspended I was from you That I didn't realise that I was floating On my own. My reflection Slowly burning away in your eyes- An ever diminishing star . And I saw you soon after Distant again Only this time facing away from me. But I have now learnt That without you I can fly free. Without ties I can appreciate all that you gave to me When you brought me up here.

Up the ladder: Shut up and Dance
Down the ladder: ...

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.4444447
Weighted score: 4.7222223
Overall Rank: 11801
Posted: July 19, 2002 6:08 PM PDT; Last modified: July 19, 2002 6:08 PM PDT
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Comments:
[4] nentwined @ 192.168.0.69 | 8-Sep-02/2:04 AM | Reply
poem rhythm/flow/cliche could use some work.
[8] forestchild7 @ 216.77.216.8 | 19-Jul-02/6:28 PM | Reply
life, love, poetry... it just works...
[8] Frass @ 138.88.28.86 | 19-Jul-02/8:53 PM | Reply
Strong, descriptive, creative phrases for feelings in a romantic relationship. Somewhat of a disempowered female feel, though. As if the man is god; he's not.
[4] dilips_10 @ 203.197.190.94 | 20-Jul-02/3:31 AM | Reply
it a point
183 view(s)




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