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motel 666 (Free verse) by crwncka1 i would like to welcome you to this place
this place where i pass my days
this place that is not mine i say
for i do not own this place i speak of
but i reassure you it is a permanent fixture
and always has been
in this seems forever time I've lived here
in this place with four walls
but this place today seems to have forever changed
my mind tells me
for today these walls spoken of
course still appear standing firm as ever
no longer separate me
no longer imprison me
for today these walls
appear to be just what they always where
instead of what my mind thought they where
just something made of dust
Up the ladder:
Do the dew
Down the ladder:
waiting in my own way
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.1666665
Posted: June 7, 2003 10:53 PM PDT; Last modified: June 7, 2003 10:53 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.0448236 Overall Rank: 6983 Comments:
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course still appear standing firm as ever" you could make this legible in a future edit, because it sucks and ruins your poem, since it makes no fucking sense.
"appear to be just what they always where" were, not where. and again in the line after that "where" is were.