poemranker ::Burst! by INTRANSIT

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Free verse № 49504

Burst!

Member since 2002 · Posted 19 May 2003 · 10 comments

When the moon Pierces the darkeness and Cascades down the valley Ripping trees Shoving rocks Flushing foliage Washing into the River Swelling the Current Raking sand Gouging soil Drowning the mouth Pressuring the reservoir Churning moss Agitating fish into frenzy Boiling the surface into multiple Tsunamis Fissuring the dam overcharging the turbines and Engulfing the oxygenation.... DISCHARGE THE WALLS! And flow forth unto yourself.

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mean 6.75 weighted 5.47 rank 2837 views 275 View voting details →

8 votes so far. Yours would make 9.8 votes so far

10 comments

[8] Bill Z Bub 19-May-03/7:23 PM Reply
There's certainly a sense of power here, but I don't get the last three lines.
[n/a] INTRANSIT › Bill Z Bub 19-May-03/7:26 PM Reply
love to tellya but I don wanna give it away. Ironically, Red hot chili peppers are on......
[8] Bill Z Bub › INTRANSIT 19-May-03/7:31 PM Reply
Oh, wait, I read it again. I think I got it.
"do a little dance andthendrink a little wata"
[n/a] INTRANSIT › Bill Z Bub 19-May-03/7:38 PM Reply
or get hammered on wine and do a little 'rankin! Yaaaaaaa.
[n/a] <{Baba^Yaga}> › INTRANSIT 19-May-03/7:50 PM Reply
Yes! Wait... don't tell my sponsor. Sounds like you had to pee on a frozen snowdrift off of the turnpike.
[n/a] INTRANSIT › <{Baba^Yaga}> 19-May-03/8:12 PM Reply
Hey, when ya gotta go......
[8] Mona Lisa 20-May-03/11:20 AM Reply
Beautifully enticing in its description, you have me wowed.8
[8] deleted user 20-May-03/12:34 PM Reply
You have a way of moving people to wherever you write about.
[8] Mr Pig 20-May-03/12:47 PM Reply
Bloody marvellous but the term Tsunami is over baking the Spotted Dick im my humble opinion. As ever though your work is an asset to this site. May I offer you an 8 I/T, would that be okay?
[n/a] INTRANSIT › Mr Pig 20-May-03/3:38 PM Reply
Hunky-dory. wave: too small. Tsunami: too big. Hmmmmm.