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time weights (Free verse) by brazen a long finger rests on
the south side the pendulum
signifying a passing
between the deeds undone
and the tasks left at hand
neither the less essential
both vital in presence
for corruption befalls all
equally in mortal passing
the accuracy of each new step
is subject to a missed beat
where all must be in tune
for destiny to shine through
and fate to plot its course
the daily winding of the parts
only works to stall tomorrow
perhaps even beyond that
but never can it be counted on
to stay on track.
note all epochs
because they never occur
without a witness
to prove that your mind
hasn't wondered a bit
into the delusion of
the fantasy ascending
and overcoming reason.
Up the ladder:
all is yet to come (version 2)
Down the ladder:
juice before coffee
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.0
Posted: May 10, 2003 1:00 AM PDT; Last modified: May 23, 2003 12:46 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.0 Overall Rank: 7874 Comments:
[8]
horus8 @ 24.126.113.154
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10-May-03/2:57 PM
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Reply
Well, it's different. That's for sure. I enjoyed it.
Very cerebral. But also vague and unclear to me.
For example: "a passing between the deeds undone and the tasks left at hand" Aren't the deeds undone also the deeds left to do, or in other words the tasks left at hand? They seem to be the exact same thing.
hmm...seems you are quite right in that fact. the point i was aiming for was for "deeds undone" to reflect the past and "tasks left at hand" to reflect the future, but it is a bit to vague. i'm still working on it, so i'll try and tighten that confusion up next.
The Gregorian calendar only succeeded in killing is quicker, that's for sure.
but it is a step above polish glow-in-the-dark sundials
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