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Relentless (Free verse) by GekoHawaii Two constants in my life
On Opposite ends
of a spinning magnet
Two distant extremes
Weaving in and out of my view
Quickly Changing
Always moving
Never letting me adjust
I reach out to chance the present
But my hand is struck down
By an invisible foe
I cannot stop this cycle
For these constants shall forever
Torment my soul
I do not stand alone in this
Others experience these demons
Many cherish one
Many embrace the other
Yet both exist as opposites
And shall always
Be a curse to me
Up the ladder:
The Magical Hairy Chair
Down the ladder:
An enchillada called revenge!
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Posted: March 22, 2003 4:18 PM PST; Last modified: March 22, 2003 4:18 PM PSTWeighted score: 5.2689414 Overall Rank: 3813 Comments:
[8]
Blindproject217 @ 68.86.0.162
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22-Mar-03/6:03 PM
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Reply
I like how you spaced the lines to make them seem opposite, what would have been cooler is if you had made this poem as an argument with yourself and had each line opposing the one before. I still like it though, 8
Cool setup... Nice poem. Keep writing. Keep expressing yourself, you intelligent being you.
The way that your words talk about being pulled to different sides and then your eyes feel like they are being pulled to the other side of the page,*gasp for breathe* is absoluty genius. I'm creating a new award just for you. You get the BOORAH GRANDMA AWARD and the SWEET NEVER BEFORE AWARD. -10- and -10- But seeing as to how I only have one vote... You only get -10-
I like the format, i like it...someone should throw a cookie at you from down the hall and scream profanities...sounds familiar doesnt it? ;) -8-
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