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Eternity (Other) by Jigg I am always going, but never do
What I've started I'll see through
I'm always leaving, yet never go
Supposed to be here and although
I'm always making all the plans
To travel to these far off lands
I'm always brought back down to earth
When I realise my own worth
I'm always gonna just be me
It's all I am am and can be
I'm always gonna be like this
And all the world I'll have to miss
Up the ladder:
EarthWaterAir - Hey! Look! IM MR FIRE!
Down the ladder:
The Thirteenth Loser
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 4.9
Posted: February 3, 2003 12:35 PM PST; Last modified: February 3, 2003 12:35 PM PSTWeighted score: 4.9000044 Overall Rank: 9859 Comments:
[5]
[mojo] @ 195.92.194.15
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3-Feb-03/3:21 PM
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Reply
Plaintive but with an upbeat rhythm, a combination that works well 'till line seven, when it descends into borderline "angst" land. My advice, for what it's worth; you're better of going for "angry" than for "self-pity", especially with that rhythm. .5.
first 6 lines read quickly, but from there it seems to slack off. understandable. you probably had a few good lines you wanted to work with and then had to force the rest out to finish. if not, i do that a lot, so i'll just go back to being alone with my stuffed animals
you ever watch that show jag?
cute, but animo.
It's sad, but thats how I feel sometimes. Then I realized that with willpower and education you can change your own destiny.
hmmmmm
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