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Hidden (Free verse) by tbeach84
I hide away from pain, from hurt, from jealousy and pride I hide away from criticism that soon could break my stride I hide from security, from comfort and from love I hide from these painful things, proclaiming God above but in truth I am proclaiming my undying need to be liked and cared for, to fit in indeed I make so many girlfriends but when it comes to guys, I'm stuck I'm afraid of what they think of me and then run out of luck I'm afraid they'll see me as my family did so many years before I'm afraid that they will only see the artificial sores The outside is so prominent, and takes over control as my insides scream to be free, banging on my soul My girl inside just wants out, but I'm afraid to know what exactly that girl inside will bring herself to show Will she show my insecurities, my frustrations from the past will she reveal what i've been thinking of that might have strength to last will she hold my fears prisoners and be an outward voice or will she consider the possibility, the goodness of defense I'm afraid to let her see the world because what I see,I don't like I'm afraid she'll conquer everything that i tried to keep inside If i let her out, will she keep me just the same or will she change me in and out and bring me close to fame Fame will not come with my outerself, my innerself instead but should I face the ugly world for a tiny peice of thread that could turn into a knotted mess and never come undone or turn into a warmth-filled quilt and keep the pain unwon

Up the ladder: A Fathers Loss
Down the ladder: Formerly known as life

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Arithmetic Mean: 2.3333333
Weighted score: 4.6821256
Overall Rank: 12120
Posted: January 14, 2003 1:51 PM PST; Last modified: January 14, 2003 1:51 PM PST
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Comments:
[n/a] razorgrin @ 192.197.142.43 | 14-Jan-03/2:18 PM | Reply
angst, anyone? it goes nice with crumpets and a good Darjeeling..
[6] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 14-Jan-03/5:07 PM | Reply
soul banging is always a delightful past time activity..that, and cannulas. lol. ah the turmoil of asexuala. facinating...like learning how to play the tuba in a marching band.
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