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Earthly Delights? (Free verse) by razorgrin
It's likebeing sunk deep into the flesh of some gigantic rotten fruit. Sticky-sweet nauseating pulpy flesh surrounds you the world-juice seeps into your mouth,your pores, your every orifice. At first it tastes sweet, almost inviting, but very quickly the thick, dark taste of rot coats your tongue a sudden realization, two vital things The First: you cannot get out. Sick-sweet fruit sucks you down, squelching obscenely. The Second:All around you, eating, fucking and shitting are maggots.Unlike other maggots, however, these will never become flies and leave. They will stay here foever, squirming, rejoicing in the decay. One may lean over, latching on to you, slurping down your blood along with the fermented fruit ichor. The final shock will be when you look down and see your soft white larval body.

Up the ladder: #4

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 31
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Arithmetic Mean: 4.0625
Weighted score: 4.1742525
Overall Rank: 13250
Posted: June 21, 2002 8:21 AM PDT; Last modified: June 21, 2002 8:21 AM PDT
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Comments:
[10] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 10-Jul-02/12:35 PM | Reply
Well done. Intense. Extremely passionate. It truly is a joy to see a luscious maple leaf collector so dedicated to her work, bravo, kudo,s and hat trick manifestos to you straight edge, oh wait a minute! I gotta go apparerntly my entire state is sinking. I better save my pet tarantula and crackwhore (they can't swim) ciaop
[10] waltfreakinwhitman @ 192.193.210.27 | 15-Jul-02/3:11 PM | Reply
Cheery stuff, Sunshine. I've got 2 words for you: PRO-ZAC.
[n/a] razorgrin @ | 16-Jul-02/7:33 AM | Reply
It made me all smiley...
[9] Shin-Bojangles @ 198.164.188.188 | 13-Aug-02/12:25 AM | Reply
At least we're in our element!

=b
[n/a] <~> @ 167.206.181.179 | 17-Aug-02/10:34 AM | Reply
razor-i like the way you take me there, but it feels uneven when i say it aloud. i want to be hyp-mo-tized by it, and in shock, look down at my larval body. consider a re-write?
[n/a] razorgrin @ | 17-Aug-02/11:50 AM | Reply
A rewrite may happen. This thing came out of the madness of last year, which featured: the shittiest job ever, professors made of pure evil and 4 hours of sleep a night and their ensuing hallucinations.
[n/a] <~> @ 167.206.181.179 | 17-Aug-02/12:00 PM | Reply
madness spawns many ideas. hieronymus himself was a tad tetched. still, there is much good to be had here, and an edit would prolly do it right.
[n/a] razorgrin @ | 17-Aug-02/12:07 PM | Reply
The title came from the poster of the bosch painting that was the first thing I saw every day. I will edit, but now I am mostly working on another fiendish project.
[0] sk8boardandpoems @ 24.167.109.182 | 25-Feb-03/3:54 PM | Reply
I am finally finsihed after what i thought my last minutes on this earth i finally DID NOT read any of you poems or haikus thank the lord that i didn't it was easy judging by your titles they all sucked
[n/a] razorgrin @ 192.197.142.128 > sk8boardandpoems | 26-Feb-03/7:19 AM | Reply
What a profound insight. What a brilliant idea, voting on poems based only on titles! To think of the time I've been wasting!
[5] Tintagiles @ 198.164.219.179 > sk8boardandpoems | 26-Feb-03/7:50 AM | Reply
You know, dear creature, it's not good form to admit to giving out zeroes out of jealousy and hurt feelings.
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