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blinded (Free verse) by bxjay170 you was there waiting patiently, but i never
even notice, even when i treated you like
dirt, even when i didnt even spoke you was
there holping ill see what i saw today but i
guess it was to late. when i saw you my
heart started pounding and my stomach
dropped down to my knees. i guess i derseved
you treating me now like just a friend, i
guess i deserved you walking right pass me
and not even look at my way. and i guess i
deserved the girl i chose over you to diss
me and leave me cold just how i did to
you.now all i ask for is for a chance, one
last chance, but i dont have the courage to
ask after all i haved done, so i hope you
find a guy that will never treat you like i
treated you. And all i could do now is sit
and reminist about what i had and i didnt
even know it, i guess i was just blinded...
Up the ladder:
Just a Girl
Down the ladder:
steps of pain
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 1.6666666
Posted: November 26, 2002 9:21 AM PST; Last modified: November 26, 2002 9:21 AM PSTWeighted score: 4.602657 Overall Rank: 12486 Comments:
I have to agree with Cadacus on this. The spelling and grammer errors make it almost unbearable to read. Give it a once over before you post next time. I do like the last line though...it sums it up nicely.
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I want to read your work BUT as i am reading it my flows interupted by crap spelling and i have to start again - NOT FAIR MAN ! I know some people on here get fucked off with being told they havent spelled this or that right but as poets in our own ego masichistical ways we are striving perfectionists so as i said change it and throw you my vote [[[thanks///