poemranker ::listen by daniella

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Free verse № 25422

listen

Member since 2002 · Posted 16 Nov 2002 · 4 comments

the moaning stopped long enough to understand the man was dead. see the child was freed of the womb. feel the wound will heal. wake up the hungry ones for food will come. if you crawl through the space low enough you'll find the light has dimmed. the floor will soon cave in. air is thicker down below. now take off your hat and sit right down and strip naked just for me. for the day is getting older and lampslight makes our spirit shudder just to think, its not our time.

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mean 5.50 weighted 5.13 rank 5521 views 204 View voting details →

8 votes so far. Yours would make 9.8 votes so far

4 comments

[7] Bachus 17-Nov-02/9:33 PM Reply
not your best, but reeking of something burning true.. under and beyond.7.
[n/a] daniella › Bachus 18-Nov-02/6:26 PM Reply
bachus, i am honored truly. not a snide remark atall at all! i blush in fact.
[6] <~> 18-Nov-02/6:31 AM Reply
are you by chance a coal miner's daughter?
creepy. nice.
[n/a] daniella › <~> 18-Nov-02/6:27 PM Reply
now that you mention it, it does take you into some sort of shaft dunnit? i should have added a canary though for it to press down that image....