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In Vein (Free verse) by nentwined
enough with this self-dejection infection of lethargy melancholic YELLOW cholera dyspeptic -- I need an injection of that WATERCOLOR life with supranormal pigmentation of all the hues of the imagination; enough with this pragmatic fragmentation -- give me poetry (set me free to wander my veins) as it rains PURPLE ideas (to hurl exuberance) let me be (let me see) set me free!

Up the ladder: Ever With Me
Down the ladder: Ponder on Pagan.

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 121
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Arithmetic Mean: 6.7916665
Weighted score: 6.7796755
Overall Rank: 419
Posted: May 21, 2002 11:11 PM PDT; Last modified: August 7, 2002 11:17 PM PDT
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Comments:
[7] deleted user @ 66.8.159.55 | 22-May-02/12:41 AM | Reply
watercolor just leaped out at me. Really liked the second two stanzas. Something about the first didn't work for me.
[6] forestchild7 @ 216.77.216.8 | 19-Jul-02/4:37 PM | Reply
hmmm... interesting...
[n/a] deleted user @ 167.206.181.179 | 8-Aug-02/1:18 PM | Reply
reminded me of a Tool song. not a bad thing.
[9] tandem @ 172.147.155.109 | 9-Sep-02/7:35 PM | Reply
really enjoyed the second stanza and the basic flow between the first and second..nice work
[8] livingcanvas @ 66.218.226.101 | 12-Sep-02/11:36 AM | Reply
i hate people that sit down with their thesaurus when writing. it's too easy to notice too, noone really speaks like this. i like your poem, but come on, stop trying to impress people and just write. 3
[n/a] nentwined @ 192.168.0.69 > livingcanvas | 12-Sep-02/11:37 AM | Reply
sorry. I actually do speak like this, but ... I understand your point. thanks for the thought. :)
[n/a] nentwined @ 192.168.0.69 > livingcanvas | 12-Sep-02/11:38 AM | Reply
mind you, I don't always know the proper definitions of words I use, and sometimes it slips me up.
[n/a] nentwined @ 192.168.0.69 > livingcanvas | 12-Sep-02/11:39 AM | Reply
and happy birthday. :)
[n/a] nentwined @ 192.168.0.69 > nentwined | 12-Sep-02/11:40 AM | Reply
err, off by a month, wasn't I? 8, 9, what's the difference? fuck, and why won't I shut up? ARGH!
[8] livingcanvas @ 66.218.226.101 > nentwined | 12-Sep-02/11:50 AM | Reply
hahaha... it's cool... my own mother just called a few days ago remembering it... now i remember why we don't speak...
[8] livingcanvas @ 66.218.226.101 > nentwined | 12-Sep-02/11:49 AM | Reply
i understand if you do use extensive vocabulary. but also, i think that you should understand that writing is best conveyed when it's able to be read by most 'average' readers. however, i did still enjoy your poem, and thank you for your kind response, and for acknowledging my recent b-day... =) two big respective thumbs up to you.
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