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In Vein (Free verse) by nentwined enough with this self-dejection
infection of lethargy melancholic
YELLOW cholera dyspeptic --
I need an injection
of that WATERCOLOR life with supranormal pigmentation
of all the hues of the imagination;
enough with this pragmatic fragmentation --
give me poetry
(set me free to wander my veins)
as it rains PURPLE ideas
(to hurl exuberance)
let me be (let me see) set me free!
Up the ladder:
Ever With Me
Down the ladder:
Ponder on Pagan.
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.7916665
Posted: May 21, 2002 11:11 PM PDT; Last modified: August 7, 2002 11:17 PM PDTWeighted score: 6.7796755 Overall Rank: 419 Comments:
[7]
deleted user @ 66.8.159.55
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22-May-02/12:41 AM
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Reply
watercolor just leaped out at me. Really liked the second two stanzas. Something about the first didn't work for me.
hmmm... interesting...
reminded me of a Tool song. not a bad thing.
really enjoyed the second stanza and the basic flow between the first and second..nice work
i hate people that sit down with their thesaurus when writing. it's too easy to notice too, noone really speaks like this. i like your poem, but come on, stop trying to impress people and just write. 3
sorry. I actually do speak like this, but ... I understand your point. thanks for the thought. :)
mind you, I don't always know the proper definitions of words I use, and sometimes it slips me up.
and happy birthday. :)
err, off by a month, wasn't I? 8, 9, what's the difference? fuck, and why won't I shut up? ARGH!
hahaha... it's cool... my own mother just called a few days ago remembering it... now i remember why we don't speak...
i understand if you do use extensive vocabulary. but also, i think that you should understand that writing is best conveyed when it's able to be read by most 'average' readers. however, i did still enjoy your poem, and thank you for your kind response, and for acknowledging my recent b-day... =) two big respective thumbs up to you.
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