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Turn your back (Free verse) by kliq
Who are you? Standing in the dark I don't see you Come into the light Why do you reject the light? What did they do? The creatures of the night Do they belong to you? I don't blame you! That's all we really are Till someone finds us Till someone cracks us We are always in the dark To them. I don't know you! And I won't see you Until the day I crack that soul All you'll be is a stranger in the night So I'll turn my back And walk away And I'll come back When I know you, when I have light to shine On your dark exterior Then I'll find you Then I'll know you Then you wont be in dark!

Up the ladder: One
Down the ladder: suicide lost the plot

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 4.142857
Weighted score: 4.769479
Overall Rank: 11384
Posted: October 27, 2002 2:54 AM PST; Last modified: October 27, 2002 2:54 AM PST
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Comments:
[4] rockinindividual @ 68.85.69.50 | 1-Jan-03/1:16 PM | Reply
its rhythm is somewhat messed up...makes reading it kind of jerky...4
[4] Sunny @ 65.118.48.2 | 28-Apr-06/3:25 PM | Reply
Sooo what your portraying here is a mockery of society because we judge others without getting to know them first?? Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is what I got from it anyway...As far as my commentary goes, I really did think about the style, pattern, theme, if the poem "grabbed me" per say, and you aren't going to like this, I apologize for my honesty, but...I didn't care for it. It is not a style I enjoy: maybe I've seen it too much or just need elements such as imagery & whimsey in poetry, but that's just me. Others might completely relate. And it's not like I write about kittens & daisies or like reading that kind of material for that matter, I mean Plath is my favorite for goodness sake, so it's not that I don't appreciate the dark undertones...or flat-out obvious dark "overtones" like in this poem...
Thanks for the read however,

~Sunny
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