poemranker ::1 of 2,543 things she does that starts fires in your grassland heart. by mogwai

DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Free verse № 2194

1 of 2,543 things she does that starts fires in your grassland heart.

by mogwai

Member since 2002 · Posted 19 May 2002 · 5 comments

You wake up next to her and you wonder how the world ever got this far. She turns to you and ungums her lips before asking "What was I wearing last night?" This isn't what you expected her to say but that's exactly why you're there. You go through her wardrobe from the night before. She nods and smiles at each correct item. Your remember everything except for the colour of her socks. So you take a punt on this and say "White?" She nods and smiles. Then you say "Why did you ask me that?" She says, "I just wanted to make sure you were paying attention."

Rate it

0 is the worst, 10 the best. Pick a number, add a comment if you like, then send it. Keys: 0–9 pick, Enter sends.

mean 6.23 weighted 5.90 rank 1461 views 185 View voting details →

13 votes so far. Yours would make 14.13 votes so far

5 comments

[8] AmericanWigeon 7-Jul-02/11:54 AM Reply
Very sweet. And a cute title to boot!
[5] nentwined 9-Jul-02/7:35 PM Reply
significantly amusing, but it looks like prose to me.
[n/a] mogwai 10-Jul-02/5:09 PM Reply
I really don't draw a line, as long as it's 'poetic', then it's poetry to me. Poetry isn't about technique and rules, it's about finding the beauty in the details. Poetry should be about giving, and there's nothing giving about indecipherable mazes of self indulgent diary entries with meaning that does not extend beyond the ego of the creator. Which is what most so called 'poetry' adds up to. If more people thought about giving something in their poetry to the reader, then poetry wouldn't have such a bad reputation.
[7] deleted user 25-Jul-02/10:41 PM Reply
The title is the best thing about the poem, but there is no connection to the image of grasslands in the poem itself.
[8] Christof 18-Sep-02/7:36 AM Reply
It is a great suggestive title and maybe it would be nice to see it taken up in the poem itself, but I still like the scene that's presented here.