| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
Gaze (Haiku) by AuntyM Crisp October morn
Sun reflects on beveled glass
Rainbows to the soul
Down the ladder:
My suicide note was short and sweet
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.230769
Posted: October 5, 2002 8:32 AM PDT; Last modified: October 5, 2002 8:32 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.8997645 Overall Rank: 1463 Comments:
[9]
Dariana @ 172.155.195.61
|
6-Oct-02/5:09 AM
|
Reply
Totally in touch with these emotions.
Good contrast, nice visuals,and that grooovy warm fuzzy feeling to boot.
Crisp - overused, sun does not reflect on glass bevel to make rainbow, it refracts, the soul is not the sort of concrete entity with which strong haiku are built.
I've noticed the return of a lot of long time gone rankers lately. What, did you all get locked up for a couple years or something?
Nice haiku by the way.
I don't write much, but I do read...I shall look over some of yours.
They say the best readers become the best writers. Good to have you on board AuntyM.
I agree with Alchemy here, and don't understand what you're getting at on the INTRANSIT poem.
211 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
